Talk:Pagan tortillas

Scoring for Happy Monkey 2021 Competition

(see full scores here)

Scores and review from Shabidoo

Originality:	9/10	Highly highly original, I've certainly never read an article quite like it. The concept was great (relating meso-American colonialism with corn). And it's not just the concept in general that was original but there are many individual moments that were very unexpected. polytillistic was very original
Creativity:	8/10	I love what you did with the topic. I was expecting some cartoonish anthropomorphised tacos or tortillas made by pagans. I deducted a couple points though because you didn't really develop the pagan part quite as much, but over all it was very creative. Polytillistic was also quite creative
Humour:	7/10	There are some pretty hilarious moments in the article. I laughed out loud a few times. The dry humour and casual replacement of colonialist horrors with corn related terminology was consistently funny. Great moments include: The tortillas were packaged in unassuming paper packaging that suited short-term consumption, but not mass production. polytillistic (once I got the reference it made me laugh) urea bred tortillas such as producing monocultured corn pagan tortillas are confined to urea supremacist-sanctioned "reservations", urea-washed (made me laugh out loud) and hence this nation shall face a slow, painful decay as urea supremacist *tortillas bleed us all dry.
Final Score:	24/30
Suggestions:	This article is one of the more better developed though it is missing images and is probably only half done text wise. I really like the concept, that tortillas are oppressed victims of colonisation. As I mentioned above you haven't really done much with the pagan element of the topic which is a pity. I think this is an opportunity for more development. There are a lot of interesting gods in meso-American religions, for example "Tezcatlipoca" the god of night and wind who is known as a "smoking mirror" which could easily be introduced somehow into the article. It would be difficult to combine the concept of the oppressed tortilla with their Gods but I don't think it would be hard to find a way to combine them (perhaps the Gods are also oppressed or they just don't care and go away?). Also "Huixtocihuatl" was the God of urine so, considering how you mentioned urea a few times in the article, I think that section would write itself it you introduce it. The article is really funny though you might want to extend some of the jokes in a few places and take them to truly ridiculous extremes for example in the opening paragraph you could really milk the pathetic plight of these people, perhaps there are only 10 pagan tortillas left and the only way they can survive is to perform "cultural dances" for stupid fat American tourists"? Or to an unexpected place: "Pagan tortillas have become so dependent on chemical fertilizers that they have lost their singed texture and now taste like nitrogen". Might be a good idea to give a few examples of the atrocities they suffered. Especially funny ones! There are a few awkward sentences: "them to ensure the pagans could be divided" ought to read "them to ensure the pagans remained divided" or something like that. "Racist genocide" might be "culinary classist genocide"? "abhorrent factory tortilla farms." seems kind of strange. Perhaps: "abhorrent mass produced tortilla farms"? I would recommend placing your article just in meso-America (Aztecs for example) and not to the Americas. Until you mentioned "colonising the Americas" I had Spanish conquistadors in mind but once you mention Manifest destiny I think of the British and Americans taking over the current US which is a little bewildering because I'm fairly sure tortillas were isolated in southern Mexico and that corn growing mainly happened in central America. Same with "corn giving" perhaps could be replaced with a Mexican festival like "The day of the dead" (day of the dead popcorn?). The last sentence "bleed us all dry" is confusing as you've been talking in the 3rd person the entire article but have 1st person at the end. As for expansion I would simply recommend getting really great images and adding more details (funny examples of exploitation or urea arrogance). I truly enjoy the article and laughed a lot. Seems I gave yours the most points even though it lacks images. I really hope you finish it. Don't hesitate to ask for any other suggestions or proofing etc.

Scores and review from Sarah_Baldewijns

Originality 8/10

Creativity 9/10

Humour 7/10

Total= 24/30

Comment: Very creative use of the topic. An interesting read, too, with the introduction of an important social and historical issue as an extra dimension.

Scores and review from JJPMaster

Originality 7/10

Creativity 5/10

Humour 7/10

Total= 19/30

Comment: This article is like Gale's article in a way; it's good for what little it has, but I don't believe that enough effort was put into it for me to give it a higher score. It appears that it was created a mere few hours before the deadline. The idea is creative and original, however, I feel that the article is too short, and the humor needs to be improved, but otherwise, it's decent.

Scores and review from Cassie

Originality 10/10

Comment: I wasn't expecting an interpretation of what essentially amounts to a food product as a victim of colonization and the theft of its own lands. Very well done on this end.

Creativity 7/10

Comment: Not much to say, aside from the fact that it's pretty good. Lack of images hinders the potential of this article; I would bump it by up one point if a validly placed image was here.

Humour 7/10

Comment: Both fairly accessible and quite funny. Two great things in one article can't hurt!

Total= 24/30

General Comment:

Total Score: 91/120