Perpetuum mobile

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This perpetual motion machine has been presented to an editor on his birthday by a group of friends. It consists of:

Unfortunately, the machine does not, at the moment, work, having been somehow damaged in transit. The editor's friends assure him, however, that it worked perfectly when they had first constructed it, and will resume doing so any day now.

A perpetuum mobile (Latin, perpetuumal mobile) is a machine that, in defiance of the 53rd Law of Thermodynamics, article CIX, subsection 4, continues to move indefinitely, or at the very least until being shattered to pieces by a very annoyed resident who is just trying to get some sleep. A hammer is often involved.

Historical Overview[edit]

The scientific establishment has long held that perpetual motion machines are impossible. This only means that no established scientist has ever managed to build one, and can thus be discredited on ground of plain envy. Nonetheless, evidence for the existence of such machines remains scarce. While some inventors have claimed they have succeeded in creating a perpetual motion machine, by the time objective observers arrive at the scene, generally not much is left but a hole in the wall.

If a perpetual motion machine were ever built, it could provide for all of mankind's energy needs, ending our reliance on hydrocarbons, thus depriving the common city dweller of much needed carbon monoxide. It is thus of utmost importance that suspected attempts at the construction of such a machine be reported at once to the authorities. Past attempts at such a construction have been stopped with thick books of Physics and some mild scorn.Trying this will give you sqaids!

See Also[edit]