Nun bashing

'Note: This is not an informative article. It is a true story that REALLY happened to me.'

The Back Story

At our after school care program, many young students were forcibly forced into the somewhat questionable care of the resident sister.

I was one of those students.

The only relief we had from the nefarious nun was a Playstation gaming console. We would become immersed in the gaming programs and forget about our worldly troubles.

But the sinister sister found ways to get to us even in our world of wonder.

The cruel bride of christ had ultimate power in her realm. She.....*sob*.....had the power to ban us from the gaming console.

The Crime

I was one of those banned.

The story of the demise of my freedom is one of great sorrow and melancholy. I was wrongfully accused and dishonourably dealt with.

I was waiting my turn to play the playstation as was common in those times. All of sudden, a great ruckus broke out among the players and much chaos ensued.

In the aftermath, many students were physically, mentally and emotionally scarred. The instigator caught by the malicious nun was, wrongfully, myself.

The Plot

I had no intentions of remaining under the evil sister's malevolent regime. I refused to stay under an overly cruel punishment for a crime I did not even commit. I began to plot a magnificent plan. My plan was of such a righteous nature that no other students could understand my need for revenge.

I was on my own.

I began to revise some concepts about who was whose boss. My cunning plot consisted of myself, the nun and a sturdy chair. My plan was so brilliantly simple there was no chance for it to fail. It was time to put my plan into action.

The Righting of Wrongs

I knew that if I was to do this it must be on my own. No one could help me. This was something I needed to do for myself. And there is no time like the present.

At approximately 16:47 hours I put my plan into action.

I walked innocently up to the savage salesian, chair unnoticed at my side. She mockingly mocked me by falsly feigning compassion and so filled with righteous rage was I, that I threw my chair, the Tool of Justice, at the cruel christian and struck her limb, breaking her arm. I was filled with triumph and satisfaction, knowing that the evil regime was finally at it's end.

But that was not the case.

The Aftermath

I was consequently expelled from the after school program. I did not understand. I had righted a massive wrong, albeit not completely. And thus I am punished!?!? For some reason unbeknownst to me, all other parties involved took the side of the deceitful sister. I suffered years of psychological scrutiny, although I retained my integrity. I remained convinced that something had to be done to fix our society. But that is another story.

See also

• Evil Atheist Conspiracy