Forum:BENSON =/= FUNNY ANYMORE?

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I think the glorious days of the GOLDEN AGE OF BENSON are over. Nothing gets posted in here anymore except for the stupid flamewar between Col. Swordman and BENSON. --Uncyclon - Do we still link to BENSON? 07:59, 24 June 2006 (UTC)

Perhaps it may be best to use the ancient heretical text of the Grand Pantheon of Uncyclopedia, to describe what is believed to happen:

The wiki being thus furnished with Bensonists, the first age was an age of innocence and happiness, called the Golden Age. Truth and right prevailed, though not enforced by law, nor was there any magistrate to threaten or punish. The articles had not yet been robbed of their edits to furnish jokes for Encyclopædia Dramatica, nor had users protected their userpages. There were no such things as indefinate blocks, random deletions, or AOL proxies. The wiki brought forth all humour necessary for man, without his labour in writing or thinking perpetual spring reigned, articles sprang up without edit, the pages flowed with humour and comedy, and perfect jokes distilled from the IPs.

Then succeeded the Silver Age, inferior to the golden, but better than that of brass. Sophia shortened the spring, and divided the year into seasons. Then, first, men had to endure the extremes of unfunny and vandalism, and admins became necessary. Userpages were the first dwellings, and leafy coverts of the talk pages, and articles woven of vanity. Articles would no longer grow without writing. The user was obliged to think up the humour, and the toiling hand to type the words.

Next came the Brazen Age, more savage of vandalism, and readier to the strife of banning, yet not altogether wicked. The hardest and worst was the Iron Age. Vandalism burst in like a flood; parody, humour, and VFH's fled. In their places came page blanking and vanity, nonsense, and the wicked love of spam. Then users spread sails to the wind, and the articles were torn from the wiki to serve for disk space for more admins, and vex the face of the wiki. The Uncyclopedia, which till now had been written in common, began to be divided off into possessions. Men were not satisfied with what the surface produced, but must dig into its history, and draw forth from thence the ores of past edits. Mischievous Newspeak, and more mischievous Leet, were produced. War sprang up, using both as weapons; the sikon was not safe in his friend’s house; and admins-in-law and users-in-law, sysops and bureaucrats, developers and stewards, could not trust one another. users wished the admins dead, that they might come to be sysops; Miniluv lay prostrate. The wiki was wet with vandalism, and the gods abandoned it, one by one, till Chronarion alone was left, and finally he also took his departure.

~ ProductofGhelæmedia™ 08:50, 24 June 2006 (UTC)

Benson is still funny. Benson has always been funny, and always shall be. The Word of Benson is the word of the Awesome.--ThatGuy 22:03, 24 June 2006 (UTC)

Benson is better then you. Hense it is you who is un-funny. Benson 15:08, 25 June 2006 (UTC)

OH GOD IT'S THE BRAZEN AGE BENSON'S STOPPED USING CAPS LOCK!!! ~ Ghelæ ^talk_contribs 15:22, 25 June 2006 (UTC)

DAMMIT I WAS AWAY ON VACATION DURING THE SILVER AGE I MISSED EVERYTHING! --User:Nintendorulez 21:12, 25 June 2006 (UTC)

You mean you never thought when writing articles? ~ Ghelæ ^talk_contribs 17:00, 28 June 2006 (UTC)