Forum:Adopt-a-Retard...

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Forums: Index > BHOP > Adopt-a-Retard...
Note: This topic has been unedited for 5794 days. It is considered archived - the discussion is over. Do not add to unless it really needs a response.

Since "Bob" no longer considers me a retard, I am looking for someone to ADOPT me as his personal Retard. The lucky recipient will get all these prizes, at no additional cost:

1. I promise to shit in your shoes every night.

2. I promise to stuff as many flies in my nose as humanly possible.

3. I promise to follow you around the grocery store...yelling VERY loudly..."wait up, wait up...you promised mom you wouldn't leave me again. Don't nail my head to the floor again...MOM ... MOM "

4. I promise to hide under your bed, until such time as you are fucking your girlfriend/boyfriend. When this event occurs, I shall dutifully stick my head out and say " HEY, THAT's NOT DADDY !"

5. I promise to play in traffic WHENEVER you tell me to.

6. I promise to follow you to the movie theatre, and when the commercials are over, i shall run to the front of the screen, start masturbating...and scream out "I love you <insert name here> ! " Finnius.png

We'll take you up on that. Zero_Embi ¬_¬ Scribbling 18:12, 9 December 2007 (UTC)

No...that sounds really disturbing actually...Kitty!.gifHeck no techno | chitchat | stuff.. Argh.gif

hey i said i was sorry dude --J.R. "Bob" Dobbs 01:47, 12 December 2007 (UTC)

Yes, you have said that numerous times, "dude"...shut up already Finnius.png

Too late dude he's ours now. Zero_Embi ¬_¬ Scribbling 02:15, 12 December 2007 (UTC)

You're adopting him. There's a difference between adopting him and making him your bitch. Sig pic.PNG Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 04:46, 12 December 2007 (UTC)
Do we have to be responsible for his messes? Or just help him lead a fulfilling existence? Zero_Embi ¬_¬ Scribbling 21:28, 12 December 2007 (UTC)

I will adopt youLotofLOLS 23:31, 12 December 2007 (UTC)

Hey! We've already signed up to take the poor thing in... Besides, you don't seem to be a fit parrent[1] Zero_Embi ¬_¬ Scribbling 23:37, 12 December 2007 (UTC)

Adopt a Dictator

That's more fun. Ask a question any question and see how long they will reply--Mahmoud Ahmadinejad 01:34, 15 December 2007 (UTC)