Critter War

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FDR declaring war and unknowingly creates two signatures.

In the 1940s, when President Franklin D. Roosevelt signed the bill declaring war on Japan, he unknowingly signed on wax paper, which created TWO copies of his signature, one on the bill, one on a blank piece of paper. 5 years after WWII was over, a homicidal maniac broke out of an asylum and sought refuge in the Grand Canyon.

A few days later he found legal papers that stated that he OWNED the Grand Canyon. He took them to court and declared the Grand Canyon and land surrounding it a sovereign nation. He then set up his own Congress and Cabinet and Democracy and a Constitution mocking the US's one and declared war on insects. He then used the blank piece of paper he found with Roosevelt's signature and got the US's unknowing help in the "Critter War". The country then kidnapped tourists and forced them into the army. The US, finding out this, signs a treaty with the country for in exchange for the tourists they would give them 5,000 new recruits. They quickly agree and the US soon regretted the treaty.

War Beginnings[edit | edit source]

Support for the war in the beginning was scarce and very difficult to obtain, in fact, they were the only country in the war. Their target wasn't even a country at all! Or even human for that matter! What the hell is wrong with that guy! Well anyway, the sovereign nation, now known as INIDG (INternational Insect Destroyer Group) was under attack in the form of lawsuits from over 150 different countries for animal abuse and war for a pointless reason, AND trickery for getting the US into the war. The president dismissed these lawsuits and quoted in the January 1, 1950 issue of Time:


The other countries then fed up the INIDG's pointless "war" and let the country do what they please. (It just so happens that everyone forgot that the president of the country was an escaped homocidal maniac)

In just two months, the small 5,000 army caused casualties to:

Over 12,000 cockroaches

Over 7,000 spiders

Over 75 papaya trees (they did it just for the hell of it)

One of INIDG's many victims

When you think they had enough...[edit | edit source]

In 1955, INIDG declared that they would not stop their onslaught unless the insects surrendered. Well that wasn't going to happen because they were fucking insects! In that same year, INIDG took the Guinness Book of World Records record for most casualties caused in a single war without losing any men. It was the first of its kind!

The End. Finally![edit | edit source]

In 1960, when INIDG's first and only president died from unknown reasons (mostly believed to die from having cocaine mixed with orange juice injected in him when he was in the asylum), INIDG surrendered the war against insects for unknown reasons. The Cabinet and Congress demolished the Constitution and gave its land back to the United States. The United States then passed a law stating that all citizens may never speak of this incident ever again in their sorry lives.

Well, how the hell did they do it?[edit | edit source]

Not losing one soldier was a big part in the war. The key weapons and infantry used in this war are as follows:

Key Soldiers
Master Chief, one of INIDG's best men
Key Weapons
How did they do that with nobody noticing?
  • Atom Bomb (How the hell did THEY get that??)
  • Nuke (..Same as above)

Final words[edit | edit source]

It has been suspected that the late president of INIDG was suffereing from SHM

It has also been suspected that he had premonitions of him going on to YouTube.com and searching up Emerald Hack 4 by IzzyAraya. he remembers himself laughing his ass off.

Latest news on that crackpot![edit | edit source]

INIDG's late president was just found out to be a female! not a male! Who would of guessed! (Well everybody but that's out of the question)