User talk:Olipro

User talk:Olipro

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Hello, Olipro, you hopeless shit, God only knows why you're still here, you're evidently an entrenchant buffoon, but should you wish to continue disgracing us with your existence, then at least take the time out of your miserable life to consult the following pages:

• Fuckhead's Guide
• How to be funny and not just a cockbrain

If you read anything at all, make it the above two links, you can read, right? If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, try these:

• How Uncyclopedia is > YOU and The five pliers of Uncyclopedia
• How to get started editing on uncyclopedia
• Everything you ever wanted to know, but were afraid to ask
• Help Pages - if you need help with a specific issue

Most of us feel you are a cancer that should be cut out, so please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button () above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date so we know to ignore your tumorous shite.

If you need help, kill yourself. if you need help killing yourself; ask at the Dump, or add the following: {{help}} to this page along with a message and someone will come along and hang you from the ceiling.  --  

CLICK THE BUTTON TO MESSAGE ME, NOTHING ELSE:

Disclaimer Disclaimer Disclaimer

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Due to the way things have turned on this site, and given the fact I really hate being taken out of context, this comment is being posted simultaneously with my topic on the forum.

I don't *actually* believe in anything I wrote there to the extent it was implied, it was simply posted to highlight the sad way things are starting to turn in this community, in-fighting is breaking out and arguably the administrative actions being taken are making the situation worse, not better. I realise that you can't make everyone happy, but at the same time the way you deal with any given situation can serve to make a lot of people very unhappy, especially if you drag them into a full public humiliation.

As for the title... consider it a mild comment on the way the recent IRC debacle was dealt with; that situation could readily have been resolved using a mediation betweeen the involved parties, instead it was turned into a full-on public fuck-fest, I'm not defending what occured, I'm simply criticising the way it was dealt with, and the way it was dealt with is starting to become a norm.

I find it sad that I even feel I need to post this here; that this is what we've finally come to, nobody's truly friends any more, everyone's watching and waiting to see who will be the next fuck up and come down on them with maximum force.

Nonetheless, I remain hopeful that I won't have to refer anybody to this comment. -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. 13:56, July 30, 2010 (UTC)

Infighting and pseudo power struggles have gone on here since the beginning, just as the do within any sort of social grouping. The biggest irony is of course that the sense of injustice individual people are highlighting are frequently those they themselves are in turn "guilty" of. As always it is far easier to spot personality flaws in others than it is to see the same in ourselves.

Lots of people have thrown around the word "community" but very few people don't put their own spin on what that is, along with how they believe the site should be run (usually involving having themselves and maybe their friends in positions of unlimited power). As I said in a previous missive we all need to look at ourselves, what we do, how we react, what we'd like to see for the site and how we improve the community by our presence here.

I too remain hopeful, that the reasons that have kept people here are the very same ones that will help us to recognise what is best for the community in all our actions here and the things that made us fall in love with the site in the first place. Of course words mean very little.....even on a website filled with them! :) -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Yes, though my focus wasn't really on power, it's more about the way any given situation is dealt with when it arises and the way people are affected by it, nobody's infalliable of course and what's done is done, but if lessons aren't learned nothing will change. -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. 14:43, July 30, 2010 (UTC)

You, sir, are obviously a hippy. ;-) --UU - natter 14:36, Jul 30

UnNews Main Page

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Did you know that there was already a redesign in the works? We've been talking about it at the Newsroom. I'm not committed to anything as of yet, but I do have some reservationg. The NavBar we've been using has gotten good, if limited, reception, and I like it a lot. I also don't hold so closely the idea that we must mimic Wikinews. I think we need to merge your new forum topic with existing discussion. Cheers! Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 16:04, July 31, 2010 (UTC)

Watching your ops work

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I've been watching your ops work on recent changes the past few days, and (putting aside all the drama stuff) you're damn good at the job. Have only heard about you second hand for the most part, and just watching you work has taught me stuff. And on the UnNews main page, I hope you, Zim, and Spike can work it out so you all feel the best result has evolved (Spike's done some really good work with the "Department" boxes and lots of other additions). Nice meeting you. Aleister 1:54 1 8

Well, the UnNews main page that we currently use was originally created by me back in '06 (and again, based on the Wikinews layout of the day) - since then various bits of it have been hacked up and modified by various people; I can't say I particularly like the layout that Gert produced because it's essentially a hackup of the inclusion templates I originally made and it has a very cluttered feel. I already have easy ways we can fit in things like the sections that are currently placed at the top of UnNews by replacing the countries row on the Beta page (and/or the one below it) -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. 02:07, August 1, 2010 (UTC)

I like your layout. The current UnNews page is very cluttered. —WIGGER WHORE Mr. Antonio Yettie (talk) [21:06 20 August 2010]

Specific comments on Main Page Beta

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• Zim's style is flagrant overuse of links, bold, and italic. In your featured stories, the style is none at all. Why?

It was faster to just copy paste, this is *entirely* down to the editing user's tastes, it can be changed to however you like it.

• I miss the links to the Specialty Indexes and archived indexes, but you say in the Forum you're going to add these.

yes, they're next on the hitlist, I'll convert one of them properly to show how it'd look and just link to the existing for the rest, if the one that's converted looks good, the rest can get the treatment.

• I miss dates on the Latest news. This is a list of news stories, not mere articles, and they should have a date, just to keep up the "newspaper" con, even in cases where it's irrelevant.

this could possibly make the titles too long, we can either add it as mouse hover text or alternatively bung in some javascript so users can decide for themselves, just changing it to always be like that would detriment lower resolutions.

• Write a new UnNews story should be further up on the page, consistent with our philosophy of encouraging incompetent new Anons to contribute.

I think this would be quite detrimental to the layout, an approach of "leave it where it is and see how it goes" would be preferable; also, readers not interested in contributing would probably find this annoying whereas someone competent enough to write an article will very likely be able to find the button where it already is.

• A list of 10 audios may have been excessive (given that at least 9 are always mine), but 4 is insufficient, and on my screen, the remainder are replaced with blank space.

Again, completely up to taste, this can trivially be expanded without screwing the layout so if you want 5/6 that'll be fine.

• Am very pleased to see show/hide applied to some of the boilerplate at the bottom.
• I deleted About us from the existing Main Page as it was ramble and the links were noise. Not sure if the About us on Beta adds anything.

It's essentially there because Wikinews has it, if there's anything better it can be replaced with, I'm all ears -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. 12:04, August 1, 2010 (UTC)

Spıke ¬ 11:26 1-Aug-10

Thanks for the reply. I do have a talk page; moreover, User:SPIKE/UnNews, toward the end, is essentially a talk page. Yes, please delete User talk:SPIKE/UnNews. I watch your page, once we have a conversation going, until it dies out; then I unwatch it. Spıke ¬ 12:14 1-Aug-10 Thanks. PS--User talk:SPIKE exists, too, for non-UnNews stuff. Spıke ¬ 12:39 1-Aug-10

Alright, I'll bung my replies here since you're watching it -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. 12:41, August 1, 2010 (UTC)

I went ahead and moved "Write an Article" up the page. I think it looks ok like that. -- impressive Ape (erect) (Riot Porn) 13:36, August 31, 2010 (UTC)

"Burninatable"

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It was a plus to show the filing timestamp of a VFD entry. But now you conceal this information (yes, I know, there is a way to see it), in favor of a simple flag, "It's toast now," which also cracks wise, which I don't like on indexes, categories, and the other nuts-and-bolts aspects of Uncyclopedia. Best of all, why don't you display the elapsed time of the VFD entry? Spıke ¬ 12:48 1-Aug-10 PS--With a color change after 24 hours, of course.... Spıke ¬ 12:50 1-Aug-10

Good idea, done -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. 12:59, August 1, 2010 (UTC)

Curious: Does the clock stop when the vote is closed or moved to the archive page? It would be interesting (though not vital) to see how many hours elapsed in the vote; it is pointless to see, a month later, how many hours have passed since the proposal was made. Spıke ¬ 14:54 1-Aug-10

No, it doesn't stop, so technically someone could deliberately delete an article an hour early and potentially get away with it, however, you can easily cross check their deletion time against the start time specified in the VFD vote table -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. 14:58, August 1, 2010 (UTC)

Cookie

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NeuroticNinjaPirate666 has awarded you a cookie! For your advice.

VFP

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I notice you featured

Would you mind putting the {{ImageFP}} in the description, just so I can gloat that something I nommed got featured? Saberwolf116 13:36, August 2, 2010 (UTC)

I've done it, although in instances like this where it's pretty clear cut it should have the template and nothing is physically stopping you from applying it, you can just Do it yourself -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. 14:40, August 2, 2010 (UTC)

Huh. I could've sworn it was protected. Saberwolf116 16:41, August 2, 2010 (UTC)

'Ello

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I'll be getting my computer back tonight, so make sure you're on Skype. - Not particularly sincere, Sir ColinAYBCUNVFHWhoringMore Whoring at 16:40, Tuesday 03 August 2010 -

I wasn't aware you'd had it taken away, you naughty boy you -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. 17:04, August 3, 2010 (UTC)

Thanks!

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I am eternally grateful! —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 11:34, 10 August 2010

Hello, sir

I'M A RETARD BECAUSE I DIDN'T REPLACE THIS TEXT

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Hey, sir. I was wondering if you can Pee Review my articles HowTo:Kill Yourself In Just 5 Minutes, Justin Beiber. The guy NOT to be., and UnBooks:2112 Overture? I want the best reviewed articles to be nominated for featured article. And I also wnated you to vote for my highest rated articles. --AchmedTheDeadTerrorist 20:44, August 20, 2010 (UTC)User:AchmedTheDeadTerrorist

May I humbly suggest two things Mr. Dead Terrorist: 1. Leaving messages on a million users' talkpages is not a good idea. Also your tone, to me, suggests you are demanding that - in this case - Olipro nominates and votes for your articles. He will nominate and vote for what he thinks is worthy. Also, I have already offered to review HowTo:Kill Yourself In Just 5 Minutes. If you submit it to pee review and drop the link on my talkpage I shall review it, posthaste. Within the hour, probably. Unless you are a sockpuppet. Are you a suckpuppet? And sorry, Olipro for invading your talkpage. —WIGGER WHORE Mr. Antonio Yettie (talk) [20:58 20 August 2010]

I'M A RETARD BECAUSE I DIDN'T REPLACE THIS TEXT

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REPLACE THIS WITH YOUR MESSAGE, DON'T PUT ANYTHING IN THE SUBJECT/HEADLINE BOX, CHANGE THE "YOUR TITLE HERE!!!" BIT INSTEAD

There is no "your title here bit " unless you mean the retard bit -oh never mind

curious to know why you have no palestine page at all and why you deleted my "palestine for physicists" --do not tell me it was too short -i am sick of that from women

can a page not start off with 20 or 30 lines and grow with contributions and edits ?

Since you're here...

I'M A RETARD BECAUSE I DIDN'T REPLACE THIS TEXT

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There's a shitload of stuff on BP and QVFD. Saberwolf116 05:09, August 22, 2010 (UTC)

What's up

I'M A RETARD BECAUSE I DIDN'T REPLACE THIS TEXT

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Hey, cool guy. I was just wondering if you can Pee Review the article UnNews:SATAN/SANTA WANTED!? It was made by some noob named "AchmedTheDeadTerrorist", but I made it longer.

--User:APR/sig 20:44, August 24, 2010 (UTC)APR

I'M A RETARD BECAUSE I REPLACED THIS TEXT, BUT NOT WITH ANYTHING OF GREATER WORTH OR VALUE.

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Yes sir, I'll get on that suicide thing right away sir! Yeah, I hit recent changes after I hit ban patrol. Then I said "Doh". Cool story, hunh? User:Mrthejazz/sig 02:43, August 31, 2010 (UTC)

That thing you mentioned I should do for my cpu.

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It finished already. I don't know how. User:Mrthejazz/sig 05:06, August 31, 2010 (UTC)

Wierd synchronicity

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While you reskinned the main page with a look alike of one of my favorite sites and whored UnNews Funnies, I created and uploaded my 200th comic from Stripgenerator.com (for which I earned a Golden Artist award) after a dry spell. Meanwhile, I get a comment on SG.com from a round eye in Japan on my strip; probably the one person in the world who would be a target audience for that particular strip. This cold medicine is working out fantastically for me. Cheers! Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 03:30, September 2, 2010 (UTC)

I'M NOT A RETARD BECAUSE I DID REPLACE THIS TEXT

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the reskin on the front page.... did you do that all yourself? I like it, nice work. Is there a spot to see all of our previous reskins of the front page? -- Soldat Teh PWNerator (pwnt!) 03:51, Sep 2

Yes I did, no there isn't. -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. 17:46, September 2, 2010 (UTC)

I'M A RETARD BECAUSE I DIDN'T REPLACE THIS TEXT

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> (Block log); 00:07 . . Olipro (Talk | contribs) blocked Mowgli (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 day (Don't whore your shite articles on the Village Dump. PS: contact me on IRC and ask nicely and I'll lift the ban.)

LOL. you are admin? how old are you? you took the trouble of inserting an "e" in "shit" where none ought to exist? LOLLLLL. you want me to meet you in IRC get the ban reversed? LOLOLOLOLOL. dude, get a life, LOL. – Preceding unsigned comment added by Mowgli (talk • contribs)

I believe it's spelled that way outside of the US.--HM (T) 18:05, September 2, 2010 (UTC)

are you being ethnocentric or a bigot? -- mowgli 18:07, September 2, 2010 (UTC)

Nobody can know what I am. Not even me.--HM (T) 18:13, September 2, 2010 (UTC)

i don't know what you are nor can i aspire to know what you are for i know not what you may be but i am getting a strong feeling that you are an idiot. am i close to the truth? please answer. while you're at it, do also tell me where they spell shit as shite. -- mowgli 18:19, September 2, 2010 (UTC)

It is an alternate spelling here in the UK we know the word shit but we also have the word shite; we don't anticipate you yanks knowing about it. Also, we can permanently ban you if you like, I'll do anything for a quiet life and you don't seem to be here to help us with that. --ChiefjusticeDS 18:23, September 2, 2010 (UTC)

nice. i'm not a yank. thus the surprise. your argument makes sense. what's with this i can perma' ban you? are you all admins high on newly secreted testestrone caused by the sudden advent of adolescence in your lives? ya, go ahead perma ban me. you think i care li'l kid? -- mowgli 18:35, September 2, 2010 (UTC)

Wow, someone's cranky.--HM (T) 18:27, September 2, 2010 (UTC)

Some days.... --ChiefjusticeDS 18:29, September 2, 2010 (UTC)

Not you...--HM (T) 18:30, September 2, 2010 (UTC)

Gay. --ChiefjusticeDS 18:30, September 2, 2010 (UTC)

Hey, am I late to the party? MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 18:31, September 2, 2010 (UTC)

No, have a vol-au-vent. --ChiefjusticeDS 18:32, September 2, 2010 (UTC)