User talk:Aleksei

Welcome!

Somebody has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic.

Hello, Aleksei, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there and there is a window over here if you don't fancy walking down the stairs. Anyway, here are a few good links for people like you:

• Beginner's Guide
• Help Pages
• Our Vanity Policies - why we don't care about your friends
• How to be funny and not just stupid

Chief welcomes you!

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button () above the edit box.

At Uncyclopedia, writing articles is not a requirement, but most people enjoy writing something while they are here. If you are critical and think the world would be infinitely better if everyone listened to you, then you should become a teacher, but check out Pee Review while they make sure you aren't a sex offender.

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, or ask an administrator on their talk page. You can also look into the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program.

OK, I know you may have seen this message on lots of other people's pages, but I still had to come to your page to leave it here. If you have absolutely any questions, no matter how trivial, feel free to ask me here.

Here are a couple of important things that you should bear in mind as a brand new user, especially if you can't be bothered reading the beginner's guide.

• Read HTBFANJS I guarantee it will be a huge help to you and will stop your early efforts being deleted on sight by administrators.
• If you want to create an article, and you wanted to call it Bleurgh, to create it in your user space you would just make the address bar look like this: www.uncyclopedia.wikia.com/User:(Your user-name here)/Bleurgh. Please don't create it on this page as this is where other users can contact you.
• Always remember rule 2 and be constructive and civil at all times. Honestly, it works (mostly) and it won't get you banned.
• Have fun, that is after all why we are all here.

Again, welcome!  ChiefjusticeDS 12:46, November 27, 2009 (UTC)

I REFUSE. IT PASSES THE SELEIGNE'S MUM TEST. BLOCK ME AS MUCH AS YOU WANT.

BUT SOON

ALL YOUR BASE WILL NOT MORE BELONG TO YOU.

APOLOGY

I'm sorry Shayleanne's mother. User: Aleksei/Shayleanne's mother.

Uh

With regards to Brisbane Grammar School, you miiiiight want to read this. --Andorin Kato 05:27, November 29, 2009 (UTC)

Ok I'll change the name :)– Preceding unsigned comment added by Aleksei (talk • contribs)

That's not the point. The page was about a bunch of non-notable people (ie, your friends/schoolmates/etc). Such pages are a no-no on Uncyclopedia. --Andorin Kato 05:31, November 29, 2009 (UTC)

What he said. Policies, and rules, and such. The difference is I have a banstick. So I'll be keeping an eye out. O_O -RAHB 06:03, November 29, 2009 (UTC)