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The Windmill was invented by Karel de Grote in 1940. Windmills were used to mill wind around the country. Later on, Windmills were commonly used to mill really gore smells (think of farts) into Germany. This is because the Germaniaks throw their poo into the river Rijn. Therefore, Dutchland is also known as the Sink of Europe.

Milling the Wind[edit]

In Dutchland, the weather is always bad. Of course it is, Dutchland is the sink of Europe, and therefore, all friggin bad weather ends up down there. One Duud, called Hanzel, got tired of the bad weather. It stopped him from freerunning and therefore he hired Karel de Grote to do his filthy work: building a Mill the wind around the country device, later shortened to Windmill.

Karel de Grote, in English, Karel the Friggin' Big One (he was really big) built a device that, powered by all the poo-water from Germany, could mill wind around. Within two Dudes (+/- 101 days) every one of the 10 inhabitants of Dutchland had a windmill.


But now, every one of them blew their bad weather around. Another Dude passed and everyone started fighting. Then Verdonk stood up in the mess, looked around, and introduced the Uitzettingsbeleid, one of the most important historical events in the history of Duchland.

It meant that every peace of bad weather (and farts) got expelled back to Europe (preferably Germany, for their poo).

But this solution only brought bigger problems...


Since Dutchland was the only "country" able to produce Windmills, other countries got all their farts. Their inhabitants decided to migrate to Duthland, and the Allochtoon was born.

The last mill[edit]

Mill after Wilders came by.

One day, it got so bad, that a Germaniak stole Geert Wilders's bike. This would not have been a problem if Wilders didn't fall into a gigantic hole on the beach, probably produced by a Germaniak, half an hour earlier. Wilders then started his Rage Against The Mills, burning all mills on his path.

On the fifth of May 1945, after 5 years of suppression by the mills, Wilders had slain the last of the mills. This day is now known as Bevrijdingsdag (KillMill Day)

Cold War[edit]

But when you think this is where all problems ended, you're terribly wrong. Karel de Grote had escaped Dutchland and sold his "how to build a Windmill" guide, including the FAQ, to almost every country, except Germany (because he still hated their guts) and Iran, because Bush didn't want that.

Now every country started building their Mills. Nobody dared to use them, for a Millwar would end in total destruction of human life on earth.

This exciting time of countries threatening to use Mills is called a Cold War, for all it's cold winters.

The Last Stand[edit]

But Geert Wilders kept destroying Mills, and soon he had destroyed all, but one. That one Mill was located in Saigon, Vietnam, and heavily protected by anUS forces. After a few Dudes of fighting, Saigon and the last Mill finally fell to Geert Wilders and his communist forces. Geert also turned North Korea and China into communists while he was at it.

Come on man, this is really fun!

Windmill headbanging[edit]

The windmill is often a type of headbanging used in peaceful, non-violent, death metal songs.

See also[edit]