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White History Month

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Caucasians partying in celebration of White History Month

White History Month, (also known as Caucasian History Month), is an annual observance for remembrance of important people and events in the history of the Caucasian diaspora. It is celebrated annually in the United States every September.


Whitey History Week (1880)

Before the United States was established, Caucasians were a minority race outnumbered by Africans, Asians and even Indians[1]; they were often negated to ghettos and inner slums in their native hometowns of Europe and the United Kingdom. The way they were treated was staggering, many of them were forced to panhandle for money because they could not find work from their black employers, many of them were also beaten up in a show of superiority from the police force of which few Caucasians were admitted. It was not until the beginning of the American revolution that the Caucasians would see a massive rise in population, thus bringing them closer to their peers.

With the establishment of the United States, the Caucasians made a place for their own; however, there was a huge problem in that African masters would often venture into the United States looking for Caucasian slaves. While enslaved, they were forced to do menial labor such as harvest crops and clean up the bathrooms of said Africans and whenever said Caucasian would get out of control, they'd be whipped or much worse, killed in front of their peers.

It would not be until 1880 when slaves began to rise up against their masters and slavery began to be outlawed throughout the entire country. It was with this that came the establishment of Whitey History Week which was praised by major Caucasian figures as it allowed the future generations to learn about Caucasians and their contributions to society. Whitey History Week occurred during the second week of September, chosen so for the birth month of Daugherty and Jamison, two prominent Africans who helped.[2]

White History Month (1975)

During the 1800's, White Slavery was a common sight.

At first everything was fine, Africans and Caucasians respected their own turf and one treated each other friendly, with the exception of separating bathrooms and giving Africans superior housing and food. This all changed in 1962 when a fellow named George Lincoln Rockwell started to speak up for the rights of Caucasians everywhere; he claimed with such ferocity that the African leaders were constantly putting down Caucasians everywhere and as he spoke, he garnered a large following thus fueling the White Rights movement.[3]

George Lincoln Rockwell would have his life tragically cut short on March 29, 1968 when an assassin shot him with a long-range rifle outside the Lorraine Motel. Though his life may have been tragically cut short, his work in securing White Rights was not lost and it would only be 7 years later that Africans in the US Government would begin to recognize Whitey History Week as White History Month, thus affirming the rights of every Caucasian in the United States and making sure that their work wasn't for vain.


People celebrating White History Month often hold large dinner parties of which a large amount of Caucasian people attend. The food at these parties are generally of Caucasian invention; hot dogs, pizza, burgers and fries and these foods are often gobbled in large amounts. Rock music and Death metal are often played at loud volumes, Caucasians would normally gather around the music and dance to it, to pay respect to the Caucasians that came before them. After eating and listening to live music, they would often pray to god thanking them for all that he's done for them and his brothers.

Whites also utilize routines and secret greetings in order to show love during white history month. Such greetings would often involve two Caucasians bumping their bellys together; a Caucasian holding up his index and pinky finger and raising it high in the sky and more commonly, a person raising a hand and then pushing it against another raised hand. These greetings have often been analyzed , some say that it meant to say Hello to one another, others say that it's some sort of offense to the common African; whatever the case, no one knows what these greetings truly mean except to the hard-blooded born & raised Caucasians.[4]


Despite it being a national holiday; White History Month still attracts criticism, sparking an annual debate about the continued usefulness and fairness of a designated month dedicated to the history of Caucasians. Many Africans state that it's unfair and unjust to offer an entire month to one race, based off the fact that Caucasians haven't really done anything for the world and just leech off their African masters; others question the contributions to society, saying that their contributions like Fried Chicken and Hip-Hop music are more important if not better to the world than Rock music and french fries.

Jim Carrey, a critic of White History Month; said "Look, our history is our history. We don't need to be forced into one month in order to appreciate it. We've done more for this world than the Africans have ever done. We helped end slavery, we helped build understanding, we helped integrate people of all colors whether they're white or brown or even yellow. If anything every Caucasian American out there should have their name printed in the history books."[5]


  1. By about 75% no less!
  2. See here.
  3. Even getting his speeches televised on such television networks such as CBS.
  4. This was from attending Caucasian Fest 2010.
  5. Jim Carrey don't need no source.

See also

The 12 Months of the Year:
January | February | March | April | May | June | July | August | September | October | November | December

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