User talk:Zombiebaron/About

Thanks, i was looking on how to fix that mistake, but i think its spelled wrong now. --69.139.138.202 19:29, 13 January 2007 (UTC)Spatz

Purim

Mad Mike "Moishe" Tyson does it, so you should too!

Yes - it's Purim already, so be like
Mike and eat some ears today!

It's the only time of year when being a Jew is fun!
Chag Purim Sameach from Rabbi Techno

---

Pesach

What a pain in the arse.

It's Matzo Constipation time once again!

Try being vegan too. 8 days of potato kugel. Great.

Chag Pesach Sameach
From Rabbi Techno

---

Rosh Hashanah

Insert Joke About Rabbis and The Horn Here

Have a happy 5770, full of honey and other stuff that probably
wouldn't have been kosher if we'd thought about it more.
from Rabbi Techno
L'shanah tovah

---

(this is beginning to look like a low-rate e-cards store...)

חג שמח

"It's a fucking miracle!"

says Mrs. Sadie Goldstein of Manchester, UK

Introducing YOU to the revolutionary new
Rabbi Techno Industries™ KLEIN OLIVE OIL BOTTLE™
By turning a standard olive oil bottle into a simple two-dimensional manifold non-orientable surface,
Rabbi Techno Industries have created an olive oil bottle which stores oil both inside and outside the glass.
Store enough oil for 8 days while appearing to only have enough for a single day easily with Rabbi Techno Industries™!
"It's not miraculous - it's mathematics!™"

Mystify your friends/the Seleucid Empire and have a Happy Hanukkah™!

---

Yom tov

Chag Purim Sameach 5770!

(Note: "5770" refers to the calories you will consume with each meal over the next two days)

You can call them Haman's pockets,
You can call them Haman's hat.
But don't kid yourself...
You're eating human ears, you freak.
(And the police are on their way.)

This cheery yom tov message has been brought to you by
Rabbi Techno

---

Pesach 5770

It's Pass-Nothing time once again!

eight whole days surviving on cardboard and kugel

Christians get chocolate at this time of year, you know.
Amazing who people will accept as moshiach just to get out of eating all that matzah.

Chag Pesach Sameach!
From Rabbi Techno

---

Latke time again!

Ways in which the world could have been much better

a Chanukah sermon from Rabbi Techno

Having successfully rebelled against the Seleucid Empire, the Maccabees decided to go on an almighty piss-up to celebrate.
When they checked the fridge, they were dismayed to discover that they only had enough beer to last for one single day.
However, a great miracle happened there. G-d made the beer last for eight days,
enough time for the Maccabees to go to the off-licence and buy more.
from Rabbi Techno
Now let's go down the pub to celebrate.

---

Chanukah sameach :-) Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 13:59, November 29, 2010 (UTC)