User talk:ULTIMOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Welcome!

Welcome to Uncyclopedia! Make yourself comfortable. Want a Coke to go with these peanuts?

Hello, ULTIMOOOOOOOOOOOOO, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. Here are a few good links for people like you:

• Beginner's Guide
• Our Vanity Policies - your cat may be amazing, but it's better to keep it a secret
• How to be funny and not just stupid

If you read anything at all, make it the above three links. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, try these:

• About Uncyclopedia and The five pliers of Uncyclopedia
• How to get started editing on Uncyclopedia
• Help Pages - if you need help with a specific issue (there are no marital advice though)

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button () above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.

At Uncyclopedia, writing articles is not a requirement, but it certainly is a fun and easy way to express your creativity. To write an article, it's recommended that you start it in your userspace (for example, User:ULTIMOOOOOOOOOOOOO/Article about stuff) so you can edit it at your leisure. If you decide to create it in the cold world of mainspace, make sure it is in accordance with the policies laid out above, and if you're not done put the "Work-In-Progress" template - {{construction}} - onto it as well.

If the current colonization doesn't suit your fancy, then browse our rewrite and idea categories. We have lots of articles just sitting around for someone to improve, so don't be afraid - dive right in!

We also have an impressive amount of rules that you should read, it'll take a couple of days at least. Then, you can reward yourself with our Welcome Party for Noobs!

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, or ask an administrator on their talk page. Additionally, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply leave a message on an adopter's talkpage to join. Again, welcome!  --‎ Mattsnow 02:38, April 5, 2012 (UTC)