User:YesTimeToEdit/mafiowelcome
We Welcome You!
The Uncyclopedia Mafia
A Family Business
Click [show] (top right)! I double dare you!
I hope you like-a the place and decide to stay-a, but if not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your right... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good-a links for newcomers. I really recommend you check them out, even if you only skim-a over them.
- The Beginner's Guide is a very useful, step by step guide.
- Our Vanity Policies - why we don't care about your friends.
- How to be funny and not just stupid (a very good read, I went through it many times when I was new).
If you read anything at all, make it the above-a three links. I'm presuming you can read, of course. You can read-a, can't you?
There is the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob Program. It's a scheme that is designed to bring experienced editors straight to you. And editor on our list of-a available mentors will be happy to "adopt" you and look after you as you start your Uncyclopedia life. You can ask anyone-a from that list that you want, if they'll adopt-a you.
- Some Advanced Editing Help, and Lots of Other Things
- My Talk Page - I'll be glad to help you out, YesTimeToEdit.
- About Uncyclopedia and The five pliers of Uncyclopedia
- How To Get Started Editing On Uncyclopedia
- Help Pages - if you need help with a specific issue
I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Again, welcome! {{{2}}}