User:Toasty Da Mosty/The Great Whale Towing Fail of 1993

Most of the time Fails are usually caused by scientists, The Committee of world records or krillin. Mother Nature realized this and decided that it along with 12 year olds all over the world decided to do life a glorious favor (Mother Nature got approval after proving that Humans were to blame for the waiting room smelling like doodoo butter and for leveling the middle east and creation of madonna also no it wasn't super genocide much to many old peoples dismay).

First she composed a gray balloon and filled it with blood(she mistook it for ketchup which is why there never was christmas we shall never forget never happened) Painted a smiling whale on it and droped on Amerikan soils on all hallows eve who took it for a dead American citizen. ACTUAL scientists mistook it for an actual whale(So close) and had carls car towing inc, tow it to their labortories(see Bathroom) so that the midgets with squeaky voices from 'Are you dumber than a 5th grader' can conduct studies such as pondering whenether or not it has a twitter, myspace, or facebook acount . But the their Towing Trucks did not have enough horse power to pull the 'american' to safety. When this failed they automacticly went to the american last resort knowing man power can be extremely over ruled by the manliness of good old 'beer power'!. This is where sports fans emerge from their HQ (Bars) for various reasons involving musculiar building, This also shows off mankinds most prized possesion(note a sobrity test is needed to tell if the man is ether normal being or a being fueled by rectorial wastes fumes).

Teh great doodoo brains fail

Mother nature whiole watching the whole event was supprised at the spectacular event decided it was time to blow the load when the whale was just about in southern Hollywood also known as BSland to support it motto"instead of our ass its our mouth thats made up of it" as an insult to mankind (unknowm to Nature it all ready was an insult to begin with) but much to no ones suprise the "Amerikan" ASPLODED in Kentuckistan which later started the great kentuckistani war on terrorism, or also known as the war on bullshit as it was started by pure stupidity and a shit from a bull