User:Thatdamnedfollowspot/Tech Week/Percussive maintenance
Percussive maintenance, also known as a love tap, is the act of taking a malfunctioning object and beating the daylights out of it until it works again. Percussive maintenance is most common in computers, small children, women, and drums.
To successfully beat someone into submission perform percussive maintenance, you must first take a hard, blunt instrument (this can be whatever you choose- a wrench, your fists, a baseball bat, etc.) and directly apply the chosen instrument to whatever is malfunctioning. Repeat this step until you have either destroyed the malfunctioning object or it is working again.
The term is a play on "preventive maintenance", a paradoxical action where maintenance is performed so that maintenance is not required. Preventive maintenance is most common in
History of percussive maintenance[edit | edit source]
The origins of percussive maintenance have been disputed, and throughout time, many stories of its origin have been told. Images of prehistoric humans beating on malfunctioning objects have been discovered, and it is assumed that the art of percussive maintenance extends back to the first humans on Earth.
As technology developed and humans created the wheel, fire, and the spear, they found new ways to use percussive maintenance. If an animal was stupid enough to step out of line and attack a person, the person would use a stick, or a spear, or a flaming spear, or some combination of the three to quickly force the animal into submission.
