User:TKF/Speed Reading
Speed Reading is a pastime often performed by those schoolmakers who often can't be bothered to pay attention to every detail or every detail that details the detail of what details the sentence they pretend to read. Often, speed readers pay attention only to what doesn't in what is can't what does only is said at the beginning and end of each sentence, skipping entire phrases entirely, missing crucial details and points, entire phrases entirely, lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, and conveniently glancing over gross editing errors.
The First Section[edit | edit source]
Incidentally, the first section is the section most likely to be read by speed readers, perhaps even in full if the sentences are brief enough, unlike this one, for example. In the first section, the "reading" in "speed reading" definitely applies the most. Therefore, for this section, it would be important to include the most crucial details of speed reading, such as the history, or perhaps tips on how to become a speed reader yourself.
History[edit | edit source]
Good luck titling your section "History" and expecting a speed reader to pay attention. You see[1], speed readers will lose interest if the material isn't gripping enough, pass over it, pretending they read, not really reading, picking up information from every third or fourth paragraph, their eyes darting back and forth quickly and even quicker as they convince themselves they are actually learning. And nothing says "lose interest" like "History." Not even if HISTORY is all big and prettied up, like so. Maybe a speed reader will see HISTORY and go "Oh, I see this is about history, then. That's all I need to know about that section."
Which, actually, is completely true.
Sumptuous Young Brunette Says Moist Anal Sex Marathon Provided Her With Most Explosive Orgasm Ever Experienced[edit | edit source]
Interest is the bane of a speed reader. When something actually does sound interesting, the speed reader is forced to slow down and soak in what he or she (usually he) might find fascinating, sultry, or otherwise. It is very difficult to speed read pornography for this very reason. When training as a speed reader, one must learn to overlook all instances of interest present in text, passing by words like "orgasm," "jew gold," "roundhouse," "aquarium," and "osteoporosis" to avoid the deadly slowing effect of visual rubbernecking.
Is it, what is, it is[edit | edit source]
Concrete nouns can be easily gleaned for substance from a passage by speed readers, but what can a reader do when writing lacks such definable identifiers? It is bad to not have big words when try to read fast, for this reason.