User:Stealthy/Broccolini

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

In 2007, scientists have created a new vegetable called broccolini. This interesting food is a cross between traditional broccoli and the pasta lingini. It takes away the bad taste of broccoli by giving it a fresh, bready taste! Even better, it is said to provide kids with super powers. It is the combination of the iron from the broccoli and the starch of the pasta that creates this super power. Jon Susex, primary scientist on the project, says, "Broccolini is the bestest!"

Idea[edit | edit source]

Broccolini

The idea of broccolini was to create a tasty treat that was both good and healthy, defying the laws of physics. It took them 12 and a half years to get it, but they got it. It was put on your local H-E-B's shelves and haven't sold more than two. The two people who bought a pack threw it away once they realized it wasn't cream of wheat.

Facts[edit | edit source]

  • It is healthy, while, "tasty"
  • It cannot be destroyed
  • One day it will rule the world
  • In Soviet Russia, Broccolini throws away YOU!!


Richard Simmons' Connection with broccolini[edit | edit source]

The, "Inventor," of broccolini

Richard Simmons claimed that he invented broccolini. The press believed this, and published it in Teen People. When it never sold, Simmons was blamed because of the crappy taste. And to this day, Richard Simmons is crying about it under his bed.