User:Sgt. Fluffy/sandbox

being written

Gill Bates is one of the most sucsessful fish mongers of our time.

beginning

Gill grew up as a somewhat poor boy in a small fishing village in mississippi.

rise to fame

Gills life changed when he accidentally dropped the families toaster into his aquarium. Gill noted that not only did all the fish float to the top of the tank but also when they reached the top they were throughly cooked.

being rewriten

The Viking Cat is a rare breed of animal caused by the fusing of a feline with bloodthirsty rage.

Physiology

A viking cat wearing typical helm

A common misconception is that the Viking Cat is merely "wearing" his helmet or "wielding" his axe and warhammer. The truth is that they are glued on. A viking cat could no easier take off his helmet than a rhinoceros could take off its own horn.

Another common misconception is that Viking Cats only grow to the size of the common house cat. In truth, there is no known limit to the size a Viking Cat can grow. Its size depends on its prowess in battle. The most famous Viking Cat was Thorvald Axesword, or as France knew him, long cat.

The average Viking Cat's lifespan has not been (some say can not be) accurately studied. Due to their rather violent nature viking cats have a tendency to die in combat rather than from old age. Manuscripts from Viking cat dig sites are not much help either. Viking cats tend only to write about others only in reference to battle. If a Viking cat warrior does not participate in a battle he is simply not mentioned. similarly if a viking cat falls in battle his death is not recorded As such it is nearly impossible to tell wether he has died or simply retired.

Culture

“GRRAAAAAAARGH!”

~ Thorvald Axesword on Himself

Despite the abnormal recurrence of the words "Canned Tuna" in the Viking Cat mythology, archaeological digs have failed to uncover any means of canning in any Viking Cat excavation sites.

Religion And Mythology

Viking cat mythology centers around the great tuna. Viking cats hold, that hundreds of years ago Yothgar the savage found his fishing nets empty for the second month in a row. The northern winters were harsh and Yothgars clan was in serious danger of running out of food.

<add some more>

for this reason the can opener is consitered a sacred artifact by viking cats. This is why cats come running whenever it is sounded.

Did you know?

• It is impossible to huff a Viking Cat. All attempts to do so have ended in the would be huffer having his town sacked and burned.
• Viking Cats thought the Atlanteans were real jerks. Atlanteans were never heard from again.
• Viking Cat philosophers believed the world to be one <x>. Their word for this term was "<x>".
• Viking Cats started the < find a war>?
• You are always a superstar if you are with Viking Cats.
• Young Viking Cats (also known as Viking kittens) are expected to seek out new land to pillage. This was used as Inspiration for Led zeppelin's "immigrant"?