User:Regret Tenenbaum/UnNews: Arts and/or Crafts May Save Planet
Los Angeles, California - As the planet is being ruined by care-free activities, waste has become a way of life, the oil conglomerates further their probes into society, and the planet plunges into a pit of despair as a new dark egological age dawns upon humanity, caused by it's own negligent, sedentary lifestyle - one man found a solution that could save our planet. That man... er, child, is Sally Bellamy, 7-year-old savior of Bradbury Avenue Elementary School.
The story broke earlier this week during Arts and Crafts period, when Sally unveiled her "indoor decoration module", made from a recycled carton of orange juice, after which she commented: "maybe we could, liek, make stuff outta odder stuffs." Soon, Sally's classmates, inspired by her stroke of genius, returned home and collected every piece of trash, garbage, and unsightly junk and created various forms of thingamabobbers, do-hickies, and whatyoumacallits. Al Gore, noted eco-phile, soon caught whiff of the recycled masterpieces.
"I knew Sarah... huh? Yeah, sure, whatever... I knew she was onto something from the beginning" stated Gore earlier this week "I mean... this girl's a genius! Seriously - the whole concept behind it is cebreal gold - just don't throw garbage away! My god! And all the planet-rapists down at the White House could think of is that whole llama farm thing! FUCK!"