User:Hrodulf/Hamlet

User:Hrodulf/menu
ACT I SCENE I. Newark, New Jersey. The Bada Bing parking lot.

TONY SOPRANO at his post. Enter SILVIO

TONY Who's the fuck's there?

SILVIO It's me Ton. What, you need glasses?

TONY Fuck you, it's fucking dark out here. Did you get the stuff?

SILVIO Yeah I got the stuff.

TONY Good. Here.

(Tony hands Silvio a suitcase)

SILVIO Ok. Later Ton.

Silvio walks away.

TONY I can't wait!

Exeunt

(Later that night, at the Metropolitan Opera. It is a performance of The Magic Flute. Tony is on stage, in drag, performing the Queen of the Night Aria)

TONY Ah-ha-ha-ha hahahahahahahaha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa-
Ah-ha-ha-ha hahahahahahahaha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa-
Ah-ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha-ha
Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha HAA-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha
Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha HAA-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha

SILVIO Damn, those nutsack eating turtles really work!

ANTHONY Haha, now he're really Tony Soprano!

HAMLET I'm pissed because my father got killed by my uncle, and now he's banging my mom, and it sucks.

ANTHONY What the fuck is this asshole doing here? (kills Hamlet)

SILVIO God, he was more of a pain than that MacBeth guy . . .