User:Captain Asshole

	All Praise and Glory Be Theirs!
	This user has been promoted to the rank of Queen's Reader.
	Due to their site-topping talents in reading, all other chores formerly assigned to them have been rescinded. Unlike other ranks, this one is for life, and they will not be returning to their former tasks anytime soon. If you were hoping they would reply to a message, sorry to disappoint, but such a menial task is currently outside their job description.

Captain Asshole makes himself new friends via his trademark welcome

Captain Asshole was once a mild-mannered fellow but then the fateful hour came when he discovered the internet and realised he could be a complete asshole to everyone and be loved and praised rather than beaten senseless or ignored: thus the noble hero Captain Asshole was born!