User:Asahatter
Making Wild Stabs in the Dark[edit | edit source]
and wants to steal your country albums for sport.
(British Uncyclopedians)
Asahatter is a skilled procrastinator who from time to time puts fingers to QWERTY and makes Mr QWERTY very happy indeed. Please feel free to stroke his ego with whatever garden implement you have to hand, but remember that he has no idea what half of this site is about because he is a citizen of her Britannic Majesty, so suffers from a) Lack of social awareness regarding US culture and b) a fondness for spelling things like what Chaucer did. He makes no apologies for b) but humbly craves forgiveness for a) if you are a citizen of a former colony, which, if you can read this, you probably are.
His 5 minute mission is to seek out and create new works of fiction and to boldly split hairs, hares and infinitives with reckless abandon. Oh, and by the way, he's back, as weird as ever.
The Anatomy of Asahatter[edit | edit source]
Mouth[edit | edit source]
- The Bunfight at the OK Corral (with Mhaille). Featured.
- The Archers - life in Ambridge is great.
- All thanks to the glorious BBC Wireless 4. Featured.
- UnNews:Waiter Resigns in Phone Call Scandal - I'll own up to this too.
- UnNews:Recession forces Santa to relocate - Featured.
- Printer Ink- Featured.
- UnNews:Jade Goody's publicist "really sad"
- UnNews:Giant prank deflates village egos
- UnNews:Geordie budgie "sick as a parrot".
- UnNews:Freak atmospheric conditions suspend UK flights
Brain[edit | edit source]
Eyes[edit | edit source]
Dark room. Brian Perkins. Potato peeler. Nuff said.
Chainsaws for bayonets
As eaten at the Camptown Races
Chest[edit | edit source]
|
Potatochopper of the Month November 2008 |
|
Writer of the Month February 2010 |
[edit | edit source]
- Black and White Minstrels
- 1984 - how accurately George Orwell predicted leg warmers etc
- Francophiles - I mean, people who search the internet for pictures of men in berets
- How To: Live Forever - the Fame method