Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/23 (number)

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23 (number)

This is just going to get a mauling, I know it. Ah well. Tkotse 18:02, 3 April 2008 (UTC)

Humour:	7	i've been watching far too much Lost recently so your title was immeadiatly eye catching. as for the article itself though, i thought you had a good idea behind it and i liked how it was pretty random, it just needs to be longer. you could expand the, presumably, torturous marriage to the number, or something. but only if you turn it into an UnScript!!! first.
Concept:	6	like i said a really good idea behind it, some guy blaming his problems on a number, although that is not inherantly original you took it in a different direction claiming that the number itself burnt his house down. although you really will be able to make it clearer and funnier if you turn this into an UnScript!!!
Prose and formatting:	2	here, and with your lack of images, is where you really let your self down. this isn't really an article at all; aside from your introduction you have nothing that makes it sound real (or encyclopedic). it is clearly a conversation between two people so do the obvious and turn it into an UnScript!!! this will improve it dramatically as the large headings combined with your short single lines of text is just fugly. you could almost (do tweak it slightly) make the headings your drinking buddy and just leave it at that but turning it into an UnScript!!! gives you room to expand. although your spelling and grammar ect are ok, don't worry about those it's just the format and the fact that this isn't an article.
Images:	0	none sadly. but should you choose to turn this into an UnScript!!! find, beg for or make if you're good enough a cartoon-like picture of the number 23 burning down a house.
Miscellaneous:	3.75	averaged other scores. also this may need more and or better links. and seriously i can't stress this enough: turn this into an unscript!!! and make this a redirect.
Final Score:	18.75	seriously turn this into an UnScript!!! and you could have something brilliant here.
Reviewer:	--orian57 05:54, 4 April 2008 (UTC)