Uncyclopedia:Featured articles/November 9

Herbert the Hoover (August 10, 1908 – October 20, 1964) was the 31st President of the United States from 1929 to 1933, and remains the only vacuum cleaner to have ever held the position. His election in 1929, just months before the Wall Street Crash, is seen by some as a prime example of the cultural arrogance that came with the financial prosperity of the Roaring Twenties. Other people still think it's funny.

Herbert was built in 1908 by namesake Herbert William Hoover Sr., who famously said: "You can have him in any color, as long as it's red." The choice of a red face was thought to be a tribute to the industrialist's wife, Grace Louise Hoover, who was widely known to turn a deep crimson as she labored over an act of fellatio.

Hoover released the model later that year, drawing attention to Herbert's cheerful face in the advertising campaign, which carried the slogan, "Ladies, when you see how hard our latest Hoover sucks, your smile will be wider than Herbert's!" (Full article...)