Uncyclopedia:Featured articles/November 4

The 2010 California Marijuana Initiative laid bare the soul of America. On the losing side, freedom and self-choice, the essence of the nation's contributions to the world. On the winning side, beer and wine companies, the backbone of a nation determined to drink itself silly, protecting their turf.

Proposition 19, as it was known to the public at large ("Goin' down to Freedomland", its actual name), would have allowed California citizens over the age of 21 to openly have, use, and grow a quantity of marijuana not to exceed what they could carry in a wheelbarrow. The U.S. Justice Department, saying that the passage of Prop 19 would "be a problem", publicly worried that Californians would mail even more fine bud than usual to their buddies in the prison states. After the votes defeat, however, Attorney General Eric Holder admitted that what he was really worried about was that all the good parties would have occurred in California, enticing the hot babes who populate D.C. to migrate west. (Full article...)