UnVoyage:Going to California

Destroying national landmarks with tacky souvenirs and rubbish

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Extra tips to make your trip rock hard!

The California Bureau of Travel has created a list of necessities when traveling to the Golden State, as well as some descriptions of the state itself for prospective immigrants:

Provisions

• Stuff
• Wine

Companions

• Woman - (unkind)
• Girl - (Love in eyes), (Flowers in hair)
• Queen - (Without a king), (Plays guitar), (Cries), (Sings)
• Woman - (who has never been born)

Transportation

• Jet plane - (Big), (Not All The Same)
• Mare - (White)

Emotions

• Resoluteness - (Make up mind to make a new start)
• Aching in heart
• Uncertainty - (Wonder how tomorrow could follow today)
• Despair - (Thoughts of sinking)
• Self-delusion - (Tell self it's not as hard as it seems)
• Dreaming - (Rainy day)

Geographical features of California

Sea

• Red
• Sky - (Grey)
• Mountains - (of dreams), (includes hill)
• Canyons - (Seismically unstable)
• Path - (Straight), (High)

Deities

• Children of sun
• Gods - (Wrathful), (Pugilistic)

For those who've left, but are now going back to Cali, we recommend:

• Knowledge - (How to Party)
• Distrust - (Of your own resolve to return)
• Stylin' - (Profilin')

See also

• Led Zeppelin