UnScripts talk:The Tragedy of Ron Popeil
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From Pee Review[edit source]
I'd just like some feedback on the first UnScript created here. ~ 
Jacques Pirat, Esq. Converse : Benefactions : U.w.p.
01:17, 29 March 2007 (UTC)
| Humour: | 7 | Was quite funny, with some very funny jokes in there. Lacking of a punchline, however. |
| Concept: | 6 | The concept of it was quite hard to grasp, and it didn't really have any relation to the rest of the world, making it seem a bit irrelevant. |
| Prose and formatting: | 8 | Very good. The parts at the start with the shouting and stuff was a very funny part. |
| Images: | 1 | NEEDS IMAGES!!!!!!1one!!!11! |
| Miscellaneous: | 5 | It would have been better in a different format, like an unbook or etc. A script is quite hard to write a decent comedy in, especially if it is not going to be performed |
| Final Score: | 27 | Was very funny, but it needs to be touched up quite a lot, add a few more jokes, at least one image, less gory parts and so on. |
| Reviewer: |  08:48, 29 March 2007 (UTC)
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