UnNews:World-famous Moon Landing actor Buzz Aldrin delivers first-round KO to Floyd Mayweather

The following was obtained from the only eyewitness to said event, Jacob Lucaz, a 62-Year-Old Homeless Man and Known Substance-Abuser.

Jacob: "Man, man! Holy shit, man, brother, you're a news reporter, right, man?"

UnNews Reporter: "I suppose you could say that. Why, what happened?"

Jacob: "Man, you ain't never gonna believe this! I just saw the motherfuckin, uh, moon guy, the one that touched the moon second-"

Reporter: "Buzz Aldrin?"

Jacob: "Yea, yea! And he was fighting somebody - Get this - that one black boxer guy the uh, undefeated pretty boy..."

Reporter: "... Floyd Mayweather Jr?"

Jacob: "Yeah, dude, I just saw this shit!"

Reporter: "What happened?"

Jacob: "Well, I was in my signature alleyway off of 2nd street, doing my thing, when all of a sudden, a fucking spaceship crashes in the alley!

Reporter: "I see..."

Jacob: "Yeah, and the astronaut guy, Buzz Aldrin, hops out right, and immediately his suit falls off him and he's wearing a fucking, uh, Ohio State jersey!"

Reporter: "Just like that other homeless fellow over there?" The reporter gestures towards a man sleeping on a bench, wearing a Ohio State Buckeyes Jersey.

Jacob: "Well, his was cleaner and wasn't covered in puke. Anyway, who else comes walking down the alleyway but Floyd Mayweather Jr? Now, everybody knows that Floyd Mayweather Jr was born in Michigan, and hates the Buckeyes, right?"

Reporter: "Erm... I guess?"

Jacob: "So, motherfuckin', uhm, Floyd Weathermay screams at Aldrin something like 'Fuck you space alien bastard, not only are you an alien, you like the buckeyes, so I hate you even more!' And Aldrin whips his head around and says 'Come take this shirt off me then, Pretty-Boy Floyd!' And I'm like 'Oh Shit!' So, I unfolded this folding chair-" Jacob points to a three-legged folding chair strapped onto his back. "-and I grab my emergency Coke and I get ready for a mothafuggin show!"