UnNews:Viagra blamed for swollen Danube problem
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This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation. |
16 April 2006
BALKANS -- As several reporters of UnNews have uncovered the problems currently in the Balkans with swollen tributaries that have increased the size of the Danube to more than twice its normal April level. Not even dykes piled on dykes have been able curb the swollen Danube.
Some flood experts from other countries say that piling dykes on dykes may only make things flow faster and increase swelling elsewhere.
However, other sources point at a compelling problem with this war torn region and one solution that was performed with at least the best of intentions. During a 1969 study at Helsinki, it was noted that persons with low-libido were more prone to war or warlike behavior. Because of this study the UN spiked the food sent to the Balkans as aid with Viagra.
It was hoped that people would spend more time making love and not war has back-fired. While the countries are no longer at war, they are unilaterally experiencing one of the side effects of prolonged Viagra consumption.
Doctors have described this as one of the common side effects. "Quite typically, it is the need to urinate two to three times an hour," says Dr. Bjorge, also of Helsinki. "We must simply wait until all of the Viagra has passed out of their systems, collectively. Otherwise, events like constant swelling is to be expected."
Sources[edit | edit source]
- "Yuri" of the former KGB