UnNews:Super Algae Plans to Take Over the World
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This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation. |
1 July 2008
Chinka Chinka China - Algae, a harmless, underwater plant has become more than just that. Certain algae species bordering China have grown into intelligent Super Algae, a new species of intelligent plant with more plans than just growing and getting energy. This 'Super Algae' has made plans to take over the world.
Algae take over the world? It's true. You may think that they are just a water plant but this Super Algae can also grow on land. The algae grows rapidly - it has been around for a week and has already over grown Xiamen of the coast on China and is about 3/4 of the way across the Taiwan Strait. People are being evacuated from Taiwan, anyone stupid enough to try to fight aganst the algae will die. Scientists have tried weed killers, gases, anything that kills organic life and this algae lives on. The only thing tht scientists have discovered that does the trick is elavation. People are being warned to mave to high elavation. Hights above 12,00 feet is where this bruiser stops growing. They said even the lowest humidty can't stop this amazing plant.
"It has opened the doors to a new breed of super plant," says some world renowned scientist guy. "This Super Algae is giving information that will perhaps enhance humans!"
Still, scientists are projecting the world to be completely covered by this plant, with the exception of the elevation, within a year. "You better have the best time of your life, there won't be enough room for all of us," says the scientist guy.
This algae has planned three steps to the overtake to the world:
- Clog all water ways
- Cover all cities
- Destroy all remaining life
Hopefully science leads us to find a way to stop this plant. The results will save billions of lives. But if we do not stop it, well, prepare to meet your gruesome fate, ladies and gentleman.
Source[edit | edit source]
Some Scientist Guy "Algae Takes Over the World" Yahoo!, 1 July 2008