UnNews:Man Killed By Hogging Karaoke

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5 December 2008
Asia - A man has died from exhaustion, after refusing to stop singing at a karaoke bar in Asia. Reports from the scene, say that he sung for a marathon 52 hours, without taking a single break, for food, drink, or even to use the toilet.

Alleged photograph of the unfortunate gentleman. Current song is William, It Was Really Nothing

The man, who has not been formally identified, first started by singing the entire discography of The Smiths, before following it up with the Theme From Ghostbusters, three times in succession.

An eyewitness said “By the time he had done 48 hours straight, he was beginning to flag. His earlier rendition of How Soon is Now was spot on, arguably better than the original, but by the time he got to the Ghostbusters theme the second time, he was definitely flagging. It sounded like he was screaming Goat Busters, instead of the more traditional lyric. Nevertheless it is a tragedy, and we have slaughtered a young Boer kid, as a sign of respect”.

Karaoke, first emerged as a form of torture, from Japan and became widely used by military regimes across Asia during the 1980s, before spreading worldwide. Morrissey was unavailable for comment.

Sources

• Johnny Marr "Karaoke Death Horror" The BBC, December, 2008