UnNews:Capitalism continues despite protests

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19 October 2011

A bi-product of the movement is an 11% increase in lying down

NEW YORK, USA -- Frustrated protesters have today bemoaned the continuation of capitalism despite their global demonstrations continuing. The protests that started over a month ago on Wall Street, are a reaction to various graphs showing greed and inequality on their x and y axes. The action initially took the form of persistent low-pitch whining noises, but have since escalated to camping and using laptops.

Though over a month into the occupation, and with the movement spreading around the world, many instances of people doing capitalism are still being recorded.

26 year old iPhone user Jenny Yoghurt is one of the ‘Occupy Wall Street’ protesters, and she spoke of her exasperation: “It’s not as if we’re asking for an end to growing-old or plagiarism, we just think profit should be stopped, and we will stay camped here until it does, unless I run out of vacation.”

Celebrity support for the protest has come in quick and fast. Rosanne Barr told the New York crowd that she would immediately cease purchasing. Michael Moore criticised Wall Street for concentrating on finance to such an extent that it no longer contained any walls of note at all.

People have also criticised the movement. Right-wing talk show host Rush Limbaugh summed up the feeling of many conservative public figures, remarking that his anger has “nothing to do with Obama being black.”