Sewerside bomber

A young bomber showing his prowess at a sewerside training camp

“I once witnessed a particularly nasty explosion. I shall never forget.”

~ Noel Coward on Sewerside Bombers

Sewerside bombers a of neo-retro terrorists who destroy sanitary infrastructure with explosives. They are recognized by their crimes and by leaving detailed sewerside 'notes'. The group are not thought to have any links to the infamous Sewerside Strangler.

Manifesto

Sewerside bombers believe that the world would be better place if every river in the world flowed like the Ganges. "Affluence by Effluence" is their motto.

Profile

Generally from poor farming backgrounds, there a several fundamental personality traits common amongst Sewerside bombers. They are: gay

• Anally retentive
• Poor personal hygiene
• Retentive Anally
• Constipated
• Advocates of the Toilet roll diet.

As Shakespeare wrote in 1933,

By the sewer she lived,

by the sewer she died...

they said it was murder,

but it was sewer-cide.

History

Ancient Times

Records show that sewerside bombers have been around since ancient times. Unfortunately these records are very difficult to play on modern equipment, so accurate details on the bombers are left to the reader's imagination. What is theorized, however, is that the aquaduct system may have been a regular target for Bombers during the height of the Roman empire, as much of Rome is now in ruins.

Post War

Since the annexing of Palestine and due to the envy of Israel's sanitary system, sewerside bombings have risen in popularity, especially amongst groups young women. Some of these groups have attained international notoriety. See:

• Sewerside Girls
• The Virgin Sewersides.

Recent

Sewerside bombings since the turn of the millennium have become more common in Western countries and are now seen as a worldwide threat. Sewage treatment centres like the Pentagon are now on sewerside watch.

The most famous example of sewerside bombings in recent memory was when a group of men hijacked a airliner and tried to attack New York's sewerage system. The exercise was bungled when the World Trade Center towers were hit instead. It should be remarked regardless, that the WTC did have many toilets installed throughout the complex.

Famous Sewerside Bombers

• Thomas Crapper
• Shane Magowan
• Donald Rumsfeld

Not To Be Confused With

• Toilet Humour
• Sewerside Blonde
• Suicide Bomber