Pen/sock continuum
Origins[edit | edit source]
The Pen/Sock Continuum is a vortex first posited by Pythagoras in 497 BC in his work, "The Universal Incompatibility, or How Triangles are Formed".
The work describes the hemispheric imbalance between ink-dispensing writing implements and cotton-based foot insulators.
However, Pythagoras abandoned his studies shortly afterwards, citing the non-triangularity of the observed phenomenon.
Hypothesis[edit | edit source]
The Pen/Sock Continuum was further hypothesised in the Middle Ages by those whose socks seemed to disappear, yet whose pens became present in and of themselves, as though by some unseen force exerted intrinsically by cosmic energy.
In 1655, it was theorised by Galileo Galilei that pens materialised without human intervention. Galileo was widely ridiculed by this suggestion in writing, but not by those in Australia, who did not have pens so could not respond.
In modern times[edit | edit source]
The Italian scientist Daniele Danielini went a step further in 1755, suggesting that the disappearance of socks might occur in measurable inverse proportion to the rate of materialisation of pens.
On 7th April, 1797, the British explorer Captain Cook landed on the Isle of Socks, widely thought to be located in the South Pacific somewhere off the coast of Brisbane.
Proof[edit | edit source]
The existence of the Pen/Sock Continuum was proved in 2004 by British-Australian singer Peter Andre, who, whilst wearing socks as part of a casual sports outfit, started using a pen to sign an autograph and became stuck at the equator.