Orchestral Suite in G minor, BWV 1070

Multitasking was not his forte.

The Suite for Strings & Continuo in G minor, BWV 1070, is a sloppy work written by an alien composer with "Bach" as his full name. Intended to be thrown into the stove by the publisher who hated this work, it accidentally escaped the fire, and then, in the 1890s, settled on the Bach-Werke-Verzeichnis (BWV) catalogue and thus was categorized as "BWV 1070", which may potentially face prosecution for the unholy act of miscategorizing others' works.

Instrumentation

A more than sloppy one, with but strings and basso continuo. That's why most of those having performed the four orchestral suites (BWV 1066–1069) known to have been penned by Johann Sebastian Bach would be reluctant to perform this one.

Movements

1. Larghetto – Un poco Allegro

Written as a prelude & double fugue, the opening movement is in the form of a French overture – but with the refrain of the slow introduction amputated by the composer.

2. Torneo

Nothing more than a sloppy binary dance movement. "Torneo" is another word for "tournament," but only pretentious douchebags use it.

3. Aria

In sonata form, this movement takes up quite a special area within the entire work – which is why it's titled "Aria".

4. Menuetto alternativo – Trio

With the composer dropping the fine at the end of the main minuet and marked alternativo, this movement has the main minuet and the central trio played continuously in alternation until the conductor asks for a halt (or otherwise until any performer collapses).

5. Capriccio

The term "capriccio" refers to a "double fugue".

See also

• Moogie Boogie (Video on YouTube)