Motorized Shopping Cart

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The way of the future...

Hello there, folks. I'm Howard Hughes. You might remember me from such films as The Aviator, The Crazy Paranoid Billionaire and Boobs in the Sky. Tonight I'm going to talk to you about how Motorized Shopping Carts are the way of the future. The way of the future. The way of the future.

The way of the future?[edit]

Yes. In the future, everybody will be driving in motorized shopping carts. Say goodbye to all your cars and airplanes. Motorized shopping carts are the way of the future! The way of the future. The way of the future.

When is this future?[edit]

The way of the future...

THE FUTURE IS NOW!!!! Motorized shopping carts are popping up everywhere in parking lots, supermarkets, even online. You can even steer them with your smartphone. You can drive your motorized shopping cart while checking out your online dating profiles. The way of the future. The way of the future.

But... why?[edit]

Don't you know anything about technology? Less is more! Why bother creating a huge complicated vehicle when you can just put an engine on a shopping cart and feel the air rush through your trousers! Motorized shopping carts are the way of the future! The way of the future. The way of the future.

What do you even know about the future?[edit]

Now you've done it, punk. You think you know better? Don't talk down to me! I'm Howard Hughes, goddammit! I said jet engines were the way of the future and I was fucking right! Hell, I'm so rich, I can make motorized shopping carts the way of the future! The way of the future! The way of the future!

The way of the future...

Hey, weren't you dead or something?[edit]

What? I'm fucking Howard Hughes! I'm freaking immortal, got it! Nobody can touch me! Not even those men in black that keep following me around! You hear me?! Motorized shopping carts are the way of the future! THE WAY OF THE FUTURE! THE WAY OF THE FUTURE!

Sure, I'll accept anything you say if it makes you stop repeating yourself.[edit]

Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! THE WAY OF THE FUTURE!