Ødemarksism

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
(Redirected from Helge Ødemark)
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Logo of Ødemarksism (with explanations)

Ødemarksism is an ideology attributed to the Norwegian student Helge Ødemark, who laid down some of its basic foundations during his studies at the Trade Union's folk high school in the fall of 2004.[1]

The Problem with the World[edit | edit source]

In Ødemark's view of the world (or, synonymously, what Ødemarkistologians regard to be Ødemark's view of the world), the problems of the world are mostly or always caused by cultural diversities.[2] Ødemark saw this especially in the bokmål–nynorsk conflict in Norway, in which he meant that bokmål should be the sole official language so that the linguistical differences would vaporize.[3][4][5]

The (Final) Solution[edit | edit source]

In Ødemarksism, the endelige løsning or final solution is to silence or eliminate the cultural elites in the cultural minorities.[6] The minorities would then be forced to assimilate into the majority's culture.[7] Thereafter, the cultural majority would rule the nation for 80 years with an iron fist. This is referred to as Åttiårsriket (The Eighty-Year Reich) or the Helgemoni.[8]

After 80 years, the power will be returned to the people, who, according to Ødemark, will then have acknowlegded the advantages of Ødemarksism.

Ødemarksism in Practice[edit | edit source]

Ødemarksism would have to be conducted on a national level, and the Ødemarksistic state would then promote the ideology to other countries, primarily regionally and later globally. An Ødemarksistic state must be willing to give up its own culture for the benefit of larger cultures.[9]

Examples of Ødemarksism[edit | edit source]

In the Roman Empire, Ødemarksism was to a certain degree practiced by the Romans when they spread their language and culture throughout the Empire. An other example is The Soviet Union under Stalin, who made the Cyrrilic alphabet the only legal alphabet and imposed the Russian language on non-Russian autonomous republics in the union.[10]

Some romanists mention the French lingustic policy, which imposes Parisian French all over the country. Another example mentioned by many pedagogs is the American cultural imperialism, which imposes American culture and English language all over the world.

The leader of the Norwegian political party Fremskrittspartiet, Carl I. Hagen, once quipped, "A society without ethnic minorities is a harmonious society." "Tragic, but true," remarks Ødemark.

Rovdo-ødemarksism[edit | edit source]

Rovdo-ødemarksism is a form of blend between rovdism and ødemarksism, for example that people in a country likes to believe that there is only one culture in their country. It can also be called ødemarksistic naïveté.

Examples of rovdo-ødemarksism[edit | edit source]

In the United States, there is a common misconception that there are no dialects of American English and that there's only one variety of it. Modern linguists have now reached the conclusion that this isn't the case.

Criticism[edit | edit source]

Many critics say that soccer would be boring in an Ødemarksistic world, since there would be no nations except one. Another claim is that the process of imposing Ødemarksism would create more violence than the ideology would remove.[11]

All mathematicians familiar with Ødemarksism claim that life would be quite boring if there would be fewer cultures, since many cultural expressions would die out, like for instance classical music. (It is widely agreed in autistic circles that to be able to appreciate classical music, one has to be a mathematician.)

Philologists who have heard about Ødemarksism also claim that eighty years of oppression isn't always enough to kill a culture.[12] A historic example of that is the status of the Irish Gaelic language in Ireland: The British Kingdom suppressed the Irish language for almost 800 years, and still today the language and culture lives on.[13]

See also[edit | edit source]

References[edit | edit source]

  1. Ragnar Albatross: Autistisk idéhistorie, Bind I, 2005
  2. Helge Ødemark: Kan'ke værra sånn! En ødemarksistisk kritikk av demokratiet, 2005
  3. Helge Ødemark: Hvorfor jeg hater nynorsk, 2004
  4. Helge Ødemark & Maria Christina Wood Moe: Nynorsk er så vanskelig!, 2004
  5. Helge Ødemark: Kan jeg like å tro at nynorsk ikke finnes? En språkfiendtlig tilnærming, 2005
  6. Cf. Adolf Hitler: Die germanische Kultur, die einzige Kultur (The Germanic culture, the only culture), 1932
  7. Carl Ivar Hagen: Ødemarksismen og kampen mot etniske minoriteter i Norge, 2005
  8. Kåre Willoch: Nu tror jeg du har gått for langt. Helgemoniet i norsk politikk, 2005
  9. Jürgen Habermas: Das Ödemarksismus und die Kulturfiendtlichheit (Ødemarksism and hostility towards culture), 2005
  10. Ragnvar Albatross: Perspective ødemarksistique à l'histoire de la culture française après la revolution (Post-revolutionary cultural history in an Ødemarksistic perspective), 2003
  11. Erling Waldal: En Verden efter ødermarksistisk tankegang: En sosialantropologisk og statsvitenskapelig analyse av ødemarksismen, 2002
  12. Kristian Lillerovde: Ville eg likt å tru dette? Ødemarksisme sett i et rovdistisk lys, 2005
  13. Kristian Lillerovde & Ragnar Albatross: Europeisk historie fritt etter/efter hukommelsen, 2004

Further reading[edit | edit source]

  • Andre Ingull: Hva med menn som puler menn, da? Ødemarksismen sett fra en homses perspektiv, 2004
  • Georg Hubert: Et les intellectuels dans un êtat ødemarksistique? Comme moi par example? (What about the intellectuals in an Ødemarksistic state? Like me, for example?), 2005
  • Svein Fauskevåg: En verden uten intellektuelle anstrengelser? En idéhistorisk analyse av ødemarksismen, 2004
  • Kristoffer Høye Lie: Media i en – ødemarksistisk verden!!! En interessevekkende reportasje – om den grensesprengende ødemarksismen!!!, 2005
  • Rosemari Kön: Ødemarksismen og den Norske Kirke, 2005
  • Tore Wilhelm Tvedt: Få dem vekk og la den ariske rasen regjere! En nasjonalsosialistisk støtteerklæring til ødemarksismen, 2005
  • Jerna Solberget: Hva er lønnsomt med ødemarksisme?, 2005
  • Jean Paul Sartre: L'enfer, c'est les autres cultures (Hell is other cultures), 1956
  • Pål Ødemark: Ødemarksismen og de tomme hyllene på biblioteket, 2005
  • Erik Bye: Nei takk? Ikke begge deler?, 2005
  • Trond Giske: Kulturministerens rolle i en ødemarksistisk verden 2005
  • Dan Brown: Ødemarksism and the Illuminati, 2004
  • Carl I. Hagen: Et samfunn uten etniske minoriteter er et samfunn i harmoni, 2004