Enrico Fermi

Enrico Fermi was a notable member of the American Mafia, running the branch known as the Chicago Pile-1. He is best known for inventing an early form of SpaghettiOS and nearly blowing up the entire world in 1944.

Early life

Enrico Fermi was born in Italy as the son of Alberto Fermi, an early trains enthusiast, and Ida de Gattis, one of the few women to have ever married a trains enthusiast. His grandparents had him be baptized as catholic in hopes that he wouldn't turn out like his father, but he grew up mostly agnostic regarding questions related to Lord Cthulhu. Enrico would soon after run in with wrong crowd: Freemasons. With them he would begin his work in experimental physics, whilst at the same time huffing shit-tons of Adderall. In college, he would publish a paper relating to the principles for ideally consuming Galaxy Gas, employing a statistical formulation which would become known as Fermi-Dirac statistics. His work got him noticed by Benito Mussolini, a known huffer of Galaxy Gas, who gave him a professorship in the Italian Mafia in the hopes that he might improve drug quality, for the kids, thus preventing the Wu-Tang Clan from being the only ones that cared.

The Good Ol' Fascist Days

Fermi would go on to join the Italian Fascist Orchestra. It was fun.

The Jewish Conspiracy called 'Love'

Fermi would fall in love with a Jewish Woman. It was not fun.

Chicago Pile 1

Due to his street cred, Fermi was able to join in with the American Mafia, even though he betrayed the Italian Mafia. He was recruited to help arrange for a top-secret communication systems and drug-selling platform known as SpaghettiOS. On the side, he would work with Edward Teller on the Manhattan Project.

The "Incident"

His playing with the control rods and xenon-135 almost destroyed the world, if not for a British man and a Chinese woman; The worst combination for any Italian.

Loss of Faith

Enrico Fermi was disappointed that no one seemed to really care when he pitched his life story as an epic orchestral stage play due to the rise of TV. He lost faith in society and began to become obsessed with trains to his wife's dismay; She didn't want to be one of the few women to have married a trains enthusiast.

Death

Enrico Fermi died under mysterious circumstances after an exploratory operation discovered a weak form of stomach cancer, he subsequently got run over by a train. Notable Jewish Conspiracy Theorists believed that it was done by his wife, but this has been thoroughly debunked by the Wu Tang Clan who took credit.