Antidishestablishmentarianism

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“ Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack jump over the Antidishestablishmentarianist”

~ Oscar Wilde on Antidishestablishmentarianism


Antidishestablishmentarianism is the opposition to tablular (flatly shaped) dishes.

Inverse-antidishestablishmentarianism is the opposite of the above.

Contra-antidishestablishmentarianism is also the opposite of the above.

Hypercontra-antidishestablishmentarianism is a stronger form of that.

Converse-antidishestablishmentarianism is q->p, using logical proof algebraic formulae.

Contrabass-antidishestablishmentarianism is the instrumental bass solo version.

Iran/Contra-antidishestablishmentarianism is the Reagan-era form of this.

Etymology[edit | edit source]

The word is broken into multiple parts, and from them we can determine its original meaning.

ant-i-dish-est-a-blish-men-t-arianism: (Jamaican) Literally, an ant in the action of stealing the dish that is (est) a bitch to men who are Mr T-worshipping Arians.

Overview[edit | edit source]

Dishes are handed out to hungry, unemployed men. Shortly after this photo was taken, the dishes were charred in a fire, then smashed into little bits.

In its original form, antidishestablishmentarianism was a short-lived movement in human history, occurring only during the 3rd week of October in 1969, in the midst of the great depression. It was a period of time when people frequently ate out of tin cans, bowls, or paper-mache gourds made from worthless stock certificates. The use of a plate, or "dish", was considered a sign of wealth. A wave of rage and violence during that deadly week spread, as antidishestablismentarianistic forces collected dishes from far and wide, and burned them in massive public fires. Then they smashed the dishes into little pieces, as most dishes stand up quite well to fire. Those which could not be smashed were bent, and after bending, bent backwards repeatedly until the material forming each unrelenting dish lost its tensile strength. At this point, each dish could be more or less ripped, and maybe a bang or two with a hammer would separate it. After being separated, the process was generally repeated until each dish was merely shards of material. The material was then examined for "dishness", and if any such property remained, it was burned again, smashed, and then fed to a gorilla.

An 'Antidishestablishmentarianism" can also refer to the event that occurs when somebody decides that a word should exist that contains more letters than the English Alphabet. Unfortunately, this event is only truly observed by 3rd and 4th grade children who want to impress their friends and their teacher by dumbfounding them with a long, stupid word.

The Dish vs. Plate Controversy[edit | edit source]

By Thursday of that week, there had begun to be a large debate amongst the antidishestablismentarial forces as to the difference between a plate and a dish. Some hard liners felt that dishes and plates were exactly the same thing, whereas the more academic members often felt that plates should be spared, as dishes were their true foe. In a speech to a throng of hungry poor people who didn't really care what he had to say, Phillip Engers, a student at Colgate University of Dentistry, famously proclaimed, "A plate be a plate from time to time, but a dish be a villain of mine!" His call for peace towards plates was widely considered the beginning of the very-short-lived proplatestablishmentarianism movement.

Recent history[edit | edit source]

More recently, antidishestablishmentarianism has come to refer to the efforts of the cable television industry to destroy the satellite television industry. While many of these antidishestablishmentarian efforts consist of simple marketing schemes, some desperate local cable companies have fired lasers and trebuchets at individual satellite dishes in an effort to destroy them.


Antidishestablishmentarianism and Related Derivatives in Modern Culture[edit | edit source]

Recent developments in socio-political and the neo-cutlery movement have led to an entirely new cultural relevance subsequent to the proliferation of standard Antidishestablismmentarianism, Quasi-Antidishestablismmentarianism, Neo-Quasi-Antidishestablismmentarianism, Contra-Progressive-Neo-Antidishestablismmentarianism, Anti-Contra-Progressive-Neo-Antidishestablismmentarianism, and other similar political and culinary structures. Whether or not this reflects the present shift towards a hypo-dynamic unit of comparable significance remains vehemently altercated by scholars of the culino-political division. Disciples of the pre-dissoluted division of counter-reverted literary initiative maintain that the overarching hindrance has been, and continues to be, the refusal of the secondary sub-plural complex. Predictably, supporters of said appraisal are termed by many academics to be, as the estimable Dr. W. W. Huberdorff put it, "raging assholes".