Albuquerque, New Mexico

Albuquerque
City
The world famous Albuquerque Holiday Inn, which I am now banned from for assaulting a big fat hermaphrodite with a flock of seagulls haircut and only one nostril.
Flag
Country	United States
State	New Mexico
Founded	1706

Albukirkey Albukirkee Albukerkey Albuquerque is a city in New Mexico and the most populous city in the state, not to be confused with the largest trash pile that their nextdoor neighbor still has on their lawn that they won't clean up. Albuquerque was founded in 1706 as Alburquerque by some Spanish guy who, as was fashionable at the time, named his new city of two and a half people after the hometown of some royal. Like with a lot of cities named after a trashpile in Europe, Albuquerque (after the Yankee conquest they found it too hard to say "albur") is now the city that everybody talks about, probably because it is in a country way cooler than whatever European country Alburquerque is in. You probably didn't even know that Albuquerque was named after another city. As a matter of fact, I can probably guess that you didn't even know that there was a city in Spain named Alburquerque, because nobody lives there! Why do I even need to put the title of this article as "Albuquerque, New Mexico"? Who's searching for "Albuquerque, Spain"? Some Spaniard sitting on his ass with his laptop while he's surrounded by some tourists speaking a language he can't understand?

Come to think of it, I bet half of you looking for this article were expecting this article to be some reference to that Weird Al song he made back in the 90s that people who have never been to New Mexico associate with the city. Well guess what? The reference was already made! It's in that caption of that Holiday Inn picture. I'm TIRED of you people always walking up to me and saying "Hahahaha, you got any glazed donuts?" or "Have you ever eaten soup out of the ashtrays at the Albuquerque Holiday Inn?". It's NOT. FUNNY. I WON'T SHAVE YOUR BACK FOR A NICKEL. STOP. ASKING. ME.