User:Orangutang94/Article itinerary

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Not gonna be that annoying asshole who turns their entire profile into a list of articles, so here's where I'll keep track of stuff (hopefully no one else claims this page as their profile. 'Cause then we're gonna have a problem and an asskicking...):

In progress[edit | edit source]

  • Antonio Brown
  • Cam Newton (do it in Cam text). Example: ℂāጡ 𝙉Ҽ𝓦ȶѺŊ Ī𝓢 ā ᵭ𝚄ᵭҼ.
    • On second thought the page is now so tedious. Rework as "HowTo:Be a VEGAN football player! Starring Cam Newton"
  • Joe Buck (do it in his boring, boring voice with the occasional terrible call. Similar to John Madden)
  • Joe Burrow (faux police report inspired by Blade Runner, with Burrow as a replicant and Tom Brady as a blade runner writing the report, which gets rejected by the LAPD (who was paid off by the NFL)
  • Hot potato. Make it a decent page, maybe include an in-reference to Uncyclopedia itself being a hot potato
  • Señor Chang or Ken Jeong. Ha! Gaeeeeeeeeeeeeeey!

Think about creating[edit | edit source]

National Hand-egg leeg-ah[edit | edit source]

  • Ryan Fitzpatrick
  • Jerry Jones
  • Kyler Murray (redirect to Oompa Loompa or short jokes)
  • Russell Wilson (more short jokes? Though his "Mr. Unlimited" comments and interception are kinda wacky)
  • Derrick Henry (Attack on Titan style)
  • Marshawn Lynch (Beast mode. Have it be an interview in which he gets asked ridiculous questions and all he says is "Yeah", or "I'm just here so I don't get fined")
  • Kansas City Chiefs (Logo a parody of KFC, what else?)
  • UnNews article on Brian Flores?
  • Better version of Tim Tebow article. Take what's in the spoon, but make it better and worthy of this fork.
  • New York Giants or Eli Manning page. Make it about the derp
  • Raiders?
  • L.A. Chargers. Ideas: Chargering, Philip Rivers' derpy face as their logo
  • Pittsburgh Steelers. Do it in tone of UrinatingTree's "Yinzer" persona. And do a better job this time around so it doesn't get huffed like last time.
  • Follow-up to Deshaun Watson/Cleveland Browns article with Browns having second thoughts on Watson and begging for Baker Mayfield to play, but getting rejected. Redirect Mayfield to here.
  • Gus Johnson, the anti-Joe Buck. Make it have a lot of screaming and head a-splodes.
  • Cris Collinsworth. Now here's a guy who failed all the way up from a terrible, horny football player to become the most hated announcer in the NFL!
  • Lamar Jackson (make fun of the fact he is a "running back". Not bad for a running back!)
  • Miami Dolphins: Ideas: fukka yuuuuu Dolpheeeeen! Also Dan Marino, coke/drugs, only fans are contrarians in Buffalo, NJ, and NE, as well as bandwagoners in Florida.
  • Tennessee Titans: Attack on Titan, American legends style. Also, "Titan Up" becomes "Tits Up"

Bouncy Ball league[edit | edit source]

Geography[edit | edit source]

DCEU/DCU and MCU stuff[edit | edit source]

  • Snyder Cut... ehh, having a section on the main DCEU page should be enough, or an UnReview of it?
  • "Badass" Aquaman/Jason Momoa combo. Other roles include:
  • Henry Cavill. Have the page encompass all his role such as:
    • DCEU Superman
    • Warhammer
    • The Witcher
    • Mustache guy from Mission Impossible (it's all your fault we got mustache Superman, Paramount!)
    • Those British spy comedies

Celebzz[edit | edit source]

  • Lizzo. She's not fat, you're just meanie fat shamers. Also plays a dildo
  • Nikocado the Avocado. He identifies as skinny. Its your fault he's fat cause you pay him to chow down.
  • Hailee Steinfeld. Reference being the unknown voice of several characters like Vi and Spider-Gwen. And she's also in True Grit. And dating Josh Allen. She was also Taylor Swift's friend at one point??

Other people[edit | edit source]

Politicians[edit | edit source]

  • Nikki Haley
  • Gary Johnson. Just another stoner who ran on the Libertarian ticket!
  • William Henry Harrison. Shortest tenured president gets shortest length article. Who cares if it's a stub, his entire presidency was a stub.

Star Wars[edit | edit source]

  • Mandalorian
  • Baby Yoda
  • Rey
  • Find a better way to write an actually funny article on Ahsoka Tano. You can do better than what the spoon has on her
  • Gotta find some way to properly satire The Last Jedi... Saruman: So you have chosen... death!

Other entertainment[edit | edit source]

  • Homelander/The Boys
  • UnReview of Rebel Moon
  • Dune Movies
  • Halo TV show/Master Cheeks
    • Another idea: "UnReviews: Angry German Kid reviews the Halo TV series"
  • Fallout series
  • Something about Invincible (superhero franchise), complete with characters (Mark/Invincible, Debbie, Nolan/Omni-Man being an evil ripoff of Superman, Atom-Eve, etc), comics, TV show, the memes
  • BoJack Horseman. Really, nothing on this?

Film studios[edit | edit source]

  • Sony Pictures (do we need a catch all or disambiguation page?)
    • Columbia Pictures
      • Adam Sandler as the mascot lol. Or that can be the secondary logo.
      • Have the actual mascot, Lady Columbia, be Uncle Sam's ex-wife, who took this gig after he divorced her and fired her as America's female personification. Parody of Hollywood culture's old bias against women, having her be a has-been relegated to being a model (and as a slap to her face, have to pose like Uncle Sam's new wife).
        • In her spare time, she's your typical tough-as-nails country gal: rides her pet Pegasus named TriStar, owns a bar, smokes, slays zombies with her torch, and is a rifle fanatic living down South, all while collecting royalties from the studio using her likeness as their logo. And she almost got into a relationship with Japan's prime minister until Uncle Sam flipped out, apologized, and made a deal with her.
      • Be somewhat accurate regarding studio history, but with a comedic twist, and have Dot Warner be involved. Maybe touch on Harry Cohn being a massive dick (pun intended) and pretty much being Harvey Weinstein before Harvey Weinstein
      • Hit or miss "All American" studio bought by a soda company, then sold of to the pride of Japan
      • Filmography: Raunchy 1920s slapstick movies, 3 stooges, soap operas for dayz, Ghostbusters, crappy rom coms, Gigli, Spider-Man, Adam Sandler, Nicolas Cage, Will Smith, being completely clueless with superhero movies and needing Marvel's help
    • Screen Gems
      • AKA Scream Gems
        • kid's cartoons with that horrifying S from Hell logo
        • Cheap movies and horror movies
    • TriStar Pictures - anything, really? Can't think of much aside from the Pegasus being Lady C's pet
      • Probably a thing that was better in the 90s as they actually made movies back then
    • Sony Pictures Animation
  • MGM
    • ehh, what ideas do I have with this particular studio... the Lion, Wizard of Oz, James Bond
    • Sony bought them lol
    • Amazon bought them lol
  • A24
  • Netflix
  • Universal/NBC Comcast

Streaming services (seriously, nothing on these yet?)[edit | edit source]

Other[edit | edit source]

Articles to fix. Like, seriously[edit | edit source]

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