User:Iliosct

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This page contains extreme sarcasm.
Quick, close the window before you die from Sudden Exploded Head Syndrome.

Irony

Now, if your some bitch who reads all the lines, you read those little banners. Satan supports it, God supports it, but JESUS DOESN'T! JESUS AND GOD ARE DIFFERENT PEOPLE!

Now, heres a little about the Iliosct

Early Years

An Iliosct Greeting

An Iliosct was first recordadly born on a sunny day in 1902. The mother apparently abandoned the eggs and left the father to rape them all after hatching. But the father was shoo'd away by scientists and the 102 eggs were brought into a preserve that mimiced their natural habitat. Only two eggs hatched, one of the two Ilioscts immideitly ran outside and became God. The remaining one was brought up by a set of scientists who claimed the Iliosct as a real person. It looked identical to a bab in early years. Upon growth, at about 13-14 years, it grew awful acne. It's voice became high and squeaky, and no one but the Iliost's friends could understand her. It also grew hair in odd places it never had hair before. This was called the Terrible Event Ensues Notoriously, or T.E.E.N Years. It was concluded the first iliosct was in fact a female, for she wore bras and the word "like" followed each sentance.

Later

After the T.E.E.N years, the iliosctlayed eggs. SOme say they were at first asexual, but became sexual when the Iliosct relized how fun sex was. Shockingly, all 101 eggs hatched successfully, som girls some boys. The male Ilioscts are now extinct, 'cause they gaave bad sex and that was the only reason that there are boys. So, whenever a male was born, it was eaten or killed.

Ilioscts have an obsession with kittens, and will squeal if they see one and kill anyone who huffs or hurts them. Thats right, Regis, Iliosct assasins are out to get you!!

A kitten asleep

Mating

An Iliosct breeds to make more little Iliosct eggs twice in a lifetime, when 16 and 29. The process is simple.

• 1. THe Iliosct goes to the fast-food/subway they were born in.
• 2. It starts to strip off its clothes to the tune of "Numa Numa"
• 3. THe first person to watch, wheter it be male or female, will be grapped by the Iliosct.
• 4. It starts to roll around and have sex with the unlucky person. Authorities are advised not to mind this. It's only natural.
• 5. Then the Iliosct kills her mate.
• 6. In about 2 days, it gives birth to at least 100 eggs.
• 7. When the babies hatch, the Iliosct gives the baby to scientists for future studying.

Qoutes about the Iliost

“Iliosct thinks she's funny”

~ Captian Obious on Iliosct's humor

“I've offically been on every effing Uncyclopedia page in a quote!”

~ Oscar Wilde on himself which is totally off topic.

“Hey! THaats not ver nice!”

~ Oscar Wilde on that banner which is totally on topic.

1337 Altr Ego

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t3h Q\/C el33t!

What It Does In Freetime, When It Has Something To Do, Sunny Days, Rainy days, Winter, Spring SUmmmer and fall, 24/7, both Simutaniously.

Avatar: The Last Airbender

AND

The Sims 2

I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEEEEE THEM