From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to: navigation, search

During the early days of the Industrial Revolution, a small group of British textile artisans banded together against the progression of humanity through the use of cheap labor, poor working conditions, and advanced robotics. Inspired by Ned Ludd, a drunkard who destroyed two large stocking frames in the village of Anstey, Leicestershire in 1779 with a rock, the Luddites failed miserably in their pathetic attempts to bring an end to mass production, robotics, and the use of chlorofluorocarbons (CFCs) in aerosol sprays.

Though the Luddites only emerged two hundred years ago, they are already near extinction. The last remaining Luddites are the Amish, a genus of Luddites native to Pennsylvania.


The Luddic movement began in 1811 Nottingham following the Napoleonic Wars, the wars between the British and some French midget. A select few individuals attempted to fight the automatons being invented by wise men such as Eli Whitney and Andrew Ure. Their futile attacks against the robotic lords were pathetic and were swiftly defeated by their strong mechanical opponents. Many Luddites were heavily penalized or even executed, which might have led some to use fictitious names for protection. Sadly for the Luddites, a fictitious name did not keep them safe from a guillotine or a lynching mob.

The Luddite movement spread rapidly throughout England in 1811 and 1812, mostly popular with the elderly who have always been reluctant to adapt with the times. Many old people set fire to wool and cotton mills until the British government suppressed the movement. The Luddites met at night after on the moors surrounding the industrial towns, near the bingo halls and the Denny's. It was then they practised drills and manoeuvres. The main areas of the disturbances were Nottinghamshire in November 1811, followed by the West Riding of Yorkshire in early 1812 and Lancashire from March 1813. Battles between Luddites and the military occurred at Burton's Mill in Middleton, and at Westhoughton Mill, both in Lancashire.

The Luddites were led by

Modern day[edit]

The few remaining Luddites have trouble functioning in society.


The Unabomber, Ted Kacynski, is one of the most renowned Luddites of all-time. He used his expertise in explosives to kill off several corporate robots during the 1980s and early 1990s.