User:Arachnid/UnBooks:Crash Testing for Dummies
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Have you ever wanted to serve mankind by sacrificing yourself to help test ways to make car's safer? Are you also on medication? If you answered 'YES' to any of there questions then you need to buy this book at Amazon.com now for the low low price of $(enter total number of wikipedia articles).
Contents[edit | edit source]
This book contains pages.
Seriously (yeah right) it contains:[edit | edit source]
- FREE radioactive dummy symbols to stick on your forehead.
- These stylish decals will make you the envy of all your friends. Look sharp on any occassion while advertising your service to mankind!
- FREE Bloodstain Remover Bleach Pen (copyright rip-off) for those messy times on the job when you jsut can't seem to 'keep your head together'.
- And a partridge in a pear tree.
A good example of a destructible head.
Requirements[edit | edit source]
So you think you have what it takes to ram into a cement wall at 20, 40, and 55 miles per hour? Here is a comprehensive list of requirements you need to have to become a crash test dummy:
- Destructible Head
- See Kurt Cobain for further reference.
Test Stickers- No longer needed as they are included in the book.- A cheesy Oscar Wilde quote.
- Life and Health Insurance (large sum).
- Small IQ.
- This Book.
Quotes About The Book[edit | edit source]
“In Soviet Russia, Crash tests YOU!”
“Ow! God dammit it huuuurts!”
“Durrr *drool*”
Sources[edit | edit source]
- Buster Myth-test-dummy "[ It's NOT a Radiation Symbol: And Other Crash Test Facts!]" Gilded Lion Pub & Brewhouse, Feb. 30, 2009