Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/UnNews:News Corp. buys Uncyclomedia Foundation

Main

Current

Reviewed

Archive

Guidelines

FAQ

Committee

RotM

UnNews:News Corp. buys Uncyclomedia Foundation

Please give a good review, or be a Urologist or at least a Fresh Stain or a Communist! This is headed for VFH one way or another. --Major'GUN' Ggarfield, Le Marquis de Nofu .Complex! 18:51, 1 January 2008 (UTC)

UnNews:News Corp. buys Uncyclomedia Foundation is being reviewed by CajekHi! Your Source for Fine Scented Pee And Whatever Else Comes Out Of Him

Requested by the lazy fatcat!   Le Cejak • <-> (Jan 3) 03:15

Humour:	6	I gots some sick, but here's a review anyways. Avg of each section. intro P #1 [7] Glad you're a liberal. I like it when people make fun of Fox News, however, everyone knows it's bullshit by now, so that's a little more tired of a joke. Why would Fox pay $15 billion for uncyclopedia? Make us sound way more desperate. Second suggestion, maybe you should make a bigger deal out of a 120 year old man, whether it be Oscar Wilde or Rupert Murdoch, being in charge of uncyclomedia. I'm afraid that this is going to be an injoke, and as such will not be eligible for VFH unless it's really, really hilarious. average score, 7 beginning P #2 [5] Nope, I don't think you need that. See my concept score and notes. I think you need to parody Uncyc more than FOX. seriously. middle P #3-4 [8] You had a good idea with that renaming part. "Unbiased Writer of the Month" was pretty good. end P #5-6 [4] This isn't really an "end" so much as it is a random tangent. NEVER use real users names in your articles. You can make fun of the more famous ones ("JLEggo says that...") but really you should just stay away from it. You'll get people mad. Also, what the heck was that last paragraph? Never (there's that word again) begin the last paragraph with "On another note..." On another note? We aren't here for a lecture on whatever spills out of your brain! So, redo the last two paragraphs.
Concept:	5	I think that the point is that this won't be VFH unless it's really funny, being that it is an in-joke. As it is, the article sounds just too serious and kinda boring. Here are my suggestions: Make Uncyclopedia sound really, really conservative and serious (parody of how it really is) or Make Uncyc sound like it's pretending to be conservative and serious just so that they can get more money out of FOX Make Uncyc sound really pathetic next to FOX, willing to take any amount of money (or paperclips, or whoopie coushins, or whatever). Make it seem like, if everyone was given $10, Uncyc would be abandoned. Have Oscar say a few things in there (find some of his real quotes). For this to be VFH, it would have to be really really good. In-jokes fail 90% of the time. If I were you, I would try working on an article not so closely related to Uncyc. In fact, leave Oscar and Uncyc behind when writing an article for Uncyc. If you redid the basic concept of this article, you would get a better score.
Prose and formatting:	7	I was about to give an 8 (above average), but the first two paragraphs have to be broken up!
Images:	8	One picture is fine.
Miscellaneous:	6.5	{{Pee|6|5|7|8}}
Final Score:	32.5	I agree with this score. Not quite average, but the fixes are somewhat quick. Don't expect a VFH on this, even if it becomes really funny. If you keep writing on this, consider it just for the fun of it. If you want VFH, go to another idea. Hope I helped, Nofu guy!
Reviewer:	Le Cejak • <-> (Jan 3) 03:43