UnNews:Ravens: It's worse when you see it

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Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Footage of the incident.

The Baltimore Ravens have terminated Ray Rice's contract after video emerged of the running back knocking his then fiancée unconscious, admitting "It's worse when you see it".

Initial footage merely showed the aftermath of the incident, with Rice dragging an unconscious Janay Palmer out of a hotel elevator and dropping her face-down on the floor like a sack of potatoes. Five short months later, Rice was given a whopping two-match suspension by the NFL.

However, as the latest footage shows the knockout blow itself in graphic detail, the Ravens were forced to admit, "You know, it always sounds bad when you hear someone hit their partner. But yeah, when you actually see it, it's like totally worse."

"In retrospect, it probably merits more than a two-match ban, and I guess we shouldn't be paying him millions of dollars and putting him up on a pedestal.

Criminal charges were dropped against Rice, and he later married Palmer, who had refused to testify. He also managed to make a 7-minute public announcement in which he apologized to pretty much everyone except his wife and used the phrases "Failure is not getting knocked down, it's not getting up" and "Sorry. I just wanna hit on everything" without irony.

The Ravens had hoped that that would bring an end to the case, but the leak of the latest video has reminded the public that hitting a woman in the face is not nice.

Their spokesman added, "We hope this proves to be a clear message to our young fans: domestic abuse is never acceptable. Any man who is said to abuse his partner should be punished.

"And if he is filmed doing it, then he's really screwed."


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