UnNews:Government shutdown averted; furloughs happen anyway

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12 April 2011

These are not good times for your staff of crack reporters on the "crisis" beat.

WIKIA CITY, California -- The historic budget agreement between U.S. President Obama and Speaker of the House John Boehner was supposed to avoid a government shutdown, but layoffs are happening anyway.

Here at Uncyclopedia headquarters, management has announced the furlough of half the UnNews staff. Publisher Morris Greeley explains:

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UnNews Senior Editors are currently inserting left-wing bias into this related article:

These projects were all cancelled when the two sides agreed on a budget for 2011. As reported, Democrats get to keep spending almost all they wanted to when they ran everything but neglected to write a budget at all; and Republicans got an abortion-funding ban in D.C.

Mr. Greeley says the hundreds of staffers were sent packing with no hard feelings; and if the political parties reach an impasse on raising the debt ceiling in May, he will be eager to hire them all back to cover the resulting chaos.

Sources[edit]

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