Forum:It is pitch dark
you are likley to be eaten by a grue, your sword is glowing softly
what do you do.... you only have a lamp and sword. – Preceding unsigned comment added by Flaminfinger13 (talk • contribs)
- I can confirm that none of those statements are true. It's actually quite well lit in here and the only person likely to eat me is my manager for editing Uncyc during work hours. --Black Flamingo 14:23, October 7, 2010 (UTC)
- I have an axe in the back room but no sword. If I turn off the lights, I will have the place pretty much like you describe - except that I have a lot of other stuff besides the axe. I have chisels, gouges, some pens and pencils, brushes, oil paints, poppy oil, a computer, a few staplers (manual, not the fancy electric ones), dozens of books, a lot of paper, linen, yute, caseine paint, leather glue, some loudspeakers, a couple of extra keyboards in case this one breaks down while I make this list, a wallet with some money in it (not much), two printers, erasers, some Oroclean, rubber bands, CD:s, DVD:s, a pocket calculator that's not in my pocket, clothes, keys, a cell phone, my wife asleep on the floor, covers, mattresses, furniture, forks, spoons, knives, another computer, a plotter, Aspirin... look, a grue could never find me amidst all this shit I have. And it's not all even listed there. But I have no sword. -- Style
Guide 19:48, October 7, 2010 (UTC)
- But do you have a lamp? Is your "sword" glowing softly? Aleister 20:08 7 10
- I have an axe in the back room but no sword. If I turn off the lights, I will have the place pretty much like you describe - except that I have a lot of other stuff besides the axe. I have chisels, gouges, some pens and pencils, brushes, oil paints, poppy oil, a computer, a few staplers (manual, not the fancy electric ones), dozens of books, a lot of paper, linen, yute, caseine paint, leather glue, some loudspeakers, a couple of extra keyboards in case this one breaks down while I make this list, a wallet with some money in it (not much), two printers, erasers, some Oroclean, rubber bands, CD:s, DVD:s, a pocket calculator that's not in my pocket, clothes, keys, a cell phone, my wife asleep on the floor, covers, mattresses, furniture, forks, spoons, knives, another computer, a plotter, Aspirin... look, a grue could never find me amidst all this shit I have. And it's not all even listed there. But I have no sword. -- Style
the lamp is off, and it is an old zork reference the finger that flames 20:44, October 7, 2010 (UTC)
As a being of pure energy
I would ignore this particular plane of existence and just go back to editing Uncyclopedia. (Except not pee reviews; those are above those who have transcended humanity.) ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* 
(talk) (stalk) Π ~ 
~ 11 Oct 2010 ~ 06:27 (UTC)
Dividers and rulers
I did have a lamp then... do you count permanent lighting fixtures in? Because I do have fluorescent tubes in the ceiling. Those go for light sabres, right? So if I have a lamp, I have a sword too. Anyway - the grues have no chance of finding me as I just stated. -- Style 
Guide 15:07, October 8, 2010 (UTC)
- I would begin masturbating feverishly. Absolutely no one, not even a Grue, would eat a dude who was whacking off. --—John Lydon 15:20, October 8, 2010 (UTC)
they would just wait till ya finish, kinda disguasted, but if they were hungry enough, and zork has a small amount of adventrurers still playing, soo yeah....... you just jizzed your last jizz
- It would be worth it-- 03:34, October 9, 2010 (UTC)