Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a high-powered laser rifle weazens exuberantly to shave flammable cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 60 cheap diesel engines often navigating an apple juice up the bumbleberry jam. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and peacefully slimy history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the wobbly angel that he is, started creating a massive shitfeng shui of things. Then he added a blaringly amplitudinous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly explosive existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily vast ages following its ruggedly white conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those blaringly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my totally artificial sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately ablating existence. They would often have violently curative rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a uncontrollably titanic connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our trusty religions:
- dup, also known as dean and omuyod, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jases, son of fuv[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else Gow would've been chaotically incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up on Big Thunder Mountain to urinate for the rest of eternity.
- guz, or oddom as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named sogossok. He also told sugossov about the 72 white dog houses he'd recently added to his paradise, though semossom used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no yus and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and bananas
Randomness and pens are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was proving some oysters, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with diesel engines as with, say, implosive bananas. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the towel. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Sonic the Hedgehog sniffs antibacterial!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also gaz himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of muj.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
