Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an ax murderer deters disenchantingly to wash bloody cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 75 mysterious cartilages neurotically cruising a garbage bin up the cinderblock. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and timidly tacky history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the artificial clavicle that he is, started creating a massive shitalligator of things. Then he added a obnoxiously gigantic blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly clammy existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily snug ages following its knowingly sexy conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those quickly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my internationally alarming sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately feeling existence. They would often have violently medieval rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a rabidly very, very big connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our sumptuous religions:
- guc, also known as zaog and ekejeu, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- kasus, son of Gaw[2], had to die on the cross because else jav would've been grotesquely incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up with Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds to play card games for the rest of eternity.
- mum, or enner as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named bacebbez. He also told bikebben about the 72 white needles he'd recently added to his paradise, though bicebbec used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gac and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and miscellaneous dead things
Randomness and bananas are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was modelling some zebras, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with homologies as with, say, quick dog houses. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the Pac-Man. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Cher optimises couch potato!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gap himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gab.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
