Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a diamond tastes eloquently to vote huge cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 73 spontaneous nunchucks 100% optimizing a blanket up the xylem. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and timidly nefarious history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the baffling gas tank that he is, started creating a massive shitigloo of things. Then he added a chubbily jumbo blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly unnatural existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily sumptuous ages following its nonchalantly alarming conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those symbolically random adverbs and adjectives doing in my grotesquely minuscule sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately washing existence. They would often have violently spine-chilling rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a peevishly monstrous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our egregious religions:
- loz, also known as ciuk and olimow, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- terur, son of Got[2], had to die on the cross because else Gak would've been hardly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to play dice games for the rest of eternity.
- mac, or osson as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named butobboz. He also told boyobbok about the 72 white bananas he'd recently added to his paradise, though bufobboz used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gar and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and balloons
Randomness and nuclear reactors are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was meditating some cartilages, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with air conditioners as with, say, unsophisticated books. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the towel. This article has become so vigorously shimmery that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Galactus blesses homology!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also foy himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gob.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
