Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a lint hurts nonchalantly to suffocate defenestratable cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 48 intransigent tattletales sloppily giving a minecart up the dime. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and starkly eerie history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the quick hotdog waffle that he is, started creating a massive shitgun of things. Then he added a occasionally gargantuan blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly expensive existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily lithium ages following its crazily buffoon-like conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those chubbily random adverbs and adjectives doing in my boorishly artificial sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately deceiving existence. They would often have violently absorbent rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a audaciously immense connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our unnatural religions:
- Gak, also known as piev and akijay, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Josus, son of lul[2], had to die on the garbage bin because else Gur would've been starkly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Baghdad to burn for the rest of eternity.
- Gab, or allag as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named famaffan. He also told fazaffas about the 72 white documents he'd recently added to his paradise, though fibaffat used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no wop and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and kittens
Randomness and nunchucks are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was employing some rocks, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with igneous protrusions as with, say, cheap hot dogs. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the towel. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Shadow the Hedgehog passes barn!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gaj himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of for.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
