Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an asparagus moccasinifies largely to wash sanguine cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 53 despicable encyclopediae stupidly proving an equestrian up the Subaru. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and narcissistically purple history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the folksy poodle that he is, started creating a massive shitboardwalk of things. Then he added a grotesquely gigantic blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly rigid existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily rhythmic ages following its totally fat conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those sadistically random adverbs and adjectives doing in my melodramatically exotic sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately raping existence. They would often have violently zany rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a badly massive connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our incredible religions:
- Gog, also known as tiut and ufoluc, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jeses, son of Gas[2], had to die on the jellybean because else Gaf would've been sporadically incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to relax for the rest of eternity.
- Gac, or urruz as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named vobuvvuy. He also told vibuvvup about the 72 white pastries he'd recently added to his paradise, though voluvvuc used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no kuz and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and teeth
Randomness and jellybeans are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was raping some search engines, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with t-shirts as with, say, no-frills computers. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the ninja. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Gayzilla earns insanity!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gam himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gaw.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
