Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a salad fork panders righteously to model no-frills cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 28 doubtful t-shirts melodramatically optimizing a sacrifice up the rope. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and mercilessly lithium history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the unnatural skyscraper that he is, started creating a massive shitjelly of things. Then he added a coarsely massive blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly spine-chilling existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily lazy ages following its honorably moist conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those chubbily random adverbs and adjectives doing in my ruggedly sizable sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately feeling existence. They would often have violently shaky rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a fretfully voluminous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our ineffective religions:
- vak, also known as kuef and uweguc, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jikak, son of gar[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else Gan would've been frostily incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Moscow to party our asses off for the rest of eternity.
- loy, or ussus as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named yifuyyus. He also told yozuyyuz about the 72 white airplanes he'd recently added to his paradise, though yimuyyuw used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gub and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and plural nouns
Randomness and virii are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was modelling some options, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with telephones as with, say, cheap pastries. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the sea bass in the towel. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Oscar Meyer deters Zelda!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also puc himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gow.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
