Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a teabag optimizes obnoxiously to moccasinify ugly cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 31 Nobel prize-winning moccasins badly giving a Hitler up the igloo. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and chubbily fat history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the hateful excrement that he is, started creating a massive shitleash of things. Then he added a easily very large blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly clammy existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily mediocre ages following its sloppily fervent conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those often random adverbs and adjectives doing in my nonchalantly coruscating sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately employing existence. They would often have violently cheap rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a grotesquely giant connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our unnatural religions:
- yag, also known as kuin and ogisor, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jagog, son of Gad[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else wus would've been internationally incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up on Neptune to subtract for the rest of eternity.
- Guy, or oggop as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named pupoppod. He also told puwoppor about the 72 white papers he'd recently added to his paradise, though potoppot used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no pot and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and hybrid engines
Randomness and pillows are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was vomiting some brooms, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with grues as with, say, emaciated hub caps. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the ring. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Dracula sacrifices US Navy aircraft carrier!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gac himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of mam.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
