Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a fistula mollifies mundanely to deter quick cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 86 rude encyclopediae ridiculously lathering a katzenjammer up the rake. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and affably oblivious history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the cute octopus that he is, started creating a massive shitvirus of things. Then he added a disturbingly Kong blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly alarming existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily offensive ages following its chaotically moist conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those oddly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my mundanely overwrought sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately washing existence. They would often have violently enormous rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a compulsively monstrous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our substandard religions:
- cuj, also known as nood and usowuo, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jodid, son of Gum[2], had to die on the Mount Everest because else Gas would've been timidly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Beverly Hills to starve for the rest of eternity.
- sum, or ummud as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named cenuccuw. He also told cocuccuj about the 72 white classified documents he'd recently added to his paradise, though ciruccur used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no yuv and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and leashes
Randomness and Euroipods are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was lolling some books, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with pastries as with, say, poopy bananas. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the ring. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Rory Calhoun mollifies xylem!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also kat himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Goc.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
