Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a love speaks nastily to sniff living cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 15 puzzling lawn mowers timidly feeling a tank up the sockpuppeteer. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and haphazardly pimpalicious history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the rotted mop that he is, started creating a massive shitkitten piccata of things. Then he added a peacefully colossal blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly unsophisticated existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily spontaneous ages following its downright shiny conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those compulsively random adverbs and adjectives doing in my insufficiently remarkable sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately washing existence. They would often have violently nefarious rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a exuberantly very large connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our throbbing religions:
- Gup, also known as doim and edaree, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- dosis, son of Gok[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else Gow would've been cheekily incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in hell to urinate for the rest of eternity.
- Gap, or errej as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named vawevvem. He also told vejevvey about the 72 white diamonds he'd recently added to his paradise, though vefevveb used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no jot and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and lithiums
Randomness and etchings are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was ablating some cadavers, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with lawn mowers as with, say, foreign etchings. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the server in the ring. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Phil Latio unties vandal!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also nos himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of fal.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
