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Randomness

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Many experts hail Jackson Pollock's No. 5 as the most crazily random painting of the randomist movement.

Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an ad clapperclaws clearly to devour ridiculous cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 52 slippery rakes oddly sniffing an anything up the autobiography. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.

History

God as he crystallises igneous protrusions with two pointy flammable bananas.

Randomness has had a long and ruthlessly medieval history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the tofu-esque businessman that he is, started creating a massive shitfactoid of things. Then he added a ruthlessly Kong blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly doubtful existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily well-to-do ages following its insufficiently slippery conception.[1]

Hey, what are all those brutally random adverbs and adjectives doing in my verbosely vast sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!

Randomness and science

Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately insulting existence. They would often have violently scanty rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.

Randomness and religion

Randomness and religion have had a thoroughly jumbo connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our sexy religions:

  • lur, also known as fiut and agijaf, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
  • Jorar, son of Gaw[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else Guv would've been hardly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Gilgal to party our asses off for the rest of eternity.
  • Guy, or ammas as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named fogaffaj. He also told fuwaffap about the 72 white mailboxes he'd recently added to his paradise, though fubaffag used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
  • There is no Gaj and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.

Here we see an image that is most likely completely unrelated to tires.[1]


Randomness and diesel engines

Randomness and Euroipods are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was earning some reindeer, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with boats as with, say, huge magmas. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.

All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the microcosm. This article has become so vigorously rude that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Wario the Quario programmes l33t h4x0r!

See also

Supposedly random sighting(s)[6]

Footnotes

  1. 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
  2. And according to some people, at the same time also nuy himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of car.
  3. The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
  4. I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
  5. Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
  6. If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.