User talk:DeletedUser0001
Welcome[edit source]
Hello, DeletedUser0001, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. We hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Here are a few good links for n00bs:
- About Uncyclopedia
- Beginner's Guide
- The five pliers of Uncyclopedia
- How to be funny and not just stupid
- Everything you ever wanted to know, but were afraid to ask
- Help Pages (Yeah, there's more.)
We hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or the use the "sign" button () above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.
If you need help, ask me on my talk page, or ask at the Dump. Again, welcome! -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 22:09, 31 May 2006 (UTC)
UnNews:Pluto totally dissed[edit source]
Sorry, it's badly formatted, which is fixable, but the article is not funny, just stupid, so I QVFD'd it. Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 23:41, 24 August 2006 (UTC)
- I vaguely remember it being pretty bad. I weep for your disappointment, but I shed tears of joy if you learned something... or I learned something... or... something. Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 21:39, 28 August 2006 (UTC)
Audio-defilement[edit source]
Thanks for the way cool feedback on my rendering of "Cheap Rip-off of the Onion," Sources say. The article was not what I expected either, based solely on the title. If you have any ideas for a running gag, or whatever, I'll be happy to entertain the thoughts in my Wet-Vaporware. In return for your (athletic) support, I bless you. Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 15:37, 20 July 2006 (UTC)
On your knees, worthy one! The Right Reverend Major Sir Zim_ulator blesses you. Your blessings are increasing exponentially. In the name of Sophia, the Church of Uncyclopedia and the Universal Church Triumphant of the Apathetic Agnostic, kneel and receive the melding of Zim's holy axe and your wetware. Now go write me a good UnNews article. Cheers! Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 03:48, March 15, 2010 (UTC) |
Burn in hell for your sin[edit source]
So, I see Tompkins deleted your article... That's ok... Only, I had another look at it, and behold what I saw...
...
And THAT's just a single admin. MoneySign did it. She also gave me this NRV. Yet I'm somehow the one who's going to burn in hell for my sins (hopefully). Doesn't make much sense, does it? Oh well, what do I care? I'm going to hell!
...
"MoneySign did it. She also"...? She? SHE?!? S H E ? ? ? ? ? ! ! ! ! ! ! ? ? ? ? ? ? ? RAAAAH!!
...
Well, despite what my very kind and loving nature may suggest, I'm male. ^_^
Have a good one and take care! XXXXX Xx-~ sin($) tan(€) 19:00, 16 July 2006 (UTC)-xX
- Take a bow, Mrs MoneySign. You bring death, and destruction to all that you touch. -- Sir Mhaille (talk to me)
UnNews:Wanna cut in line? Denounce your religion[edit source]
Severian has awarded you a ginormous chocolate chip cookie! Now go play in traffic. |
-- Sir Severian (Sprich mit mir!) 23:27, 21 September 2006 (UTC)
Upside Down[edit source]
i dont think its going to work, and ive been told it has been done before, unless you've got a way of doing it and flipping the whole article upside down. --Braydie 00:05, 7 November 2006 (UTC)
ooh, didnt think of that, ill have to write the article normally then. thanks --Braydie 00:10, 7 November 2006 (UTC)
yeah she is, much credit to you though, yeah that is a shame, hopefully the admins will notice it or something so they could give their insight. another thing i cant get round is that the links don't work, but i think its pretty good as ive only been on here for 3/4 days :D --Braydie 00:38, 7 November 2006 (UTC)
sig check[edit source]
There we go. User:Mrthejazz/sig 02:44, 7 November 2006 (UTC)
- TOO BIG!! --Micoolio101 (whine • vandalism) 00:02, 9 November 2006 (UTC)
Xmas Mail[edit source]
Nothing says [[Insert religious or pagan holiday of your choice]] like getting drunk with a moose. So this year, why not savour a treasured Canadian tradition with a bottle of hooch, horns, hooves, and hypothermia? The drinks are on me. ~ Todd |
--Sir Todd GUN WotM MI UotM NotM MDA VFH AotM Bur. AlBur. CM NS PC (talk) 16:00, 18 December 2006 (UTC)
Sig pic[edit source]
Although your sig looks like it's the right size, resizing the image that way means the browser has to call the whole image. Which is obviously a Bad Thing. Please resize the image physically, then upload it for your sig. Or you can make a thumbnail somewhere, and link to that instead (the thumb is saved on the server at the new size, so you can link to the small version). I can help with this if you need it. Thanks -- sannse (talk) 13:11, 17 February 2007 (UTC)
- I've uploaded a small version and added it to your sig. I hope it looks OK to you. The thumb trick means you link to the small version on the server, so you don't see the thumb box - but no matter, this way works too. Let me know if you want any changes, I adjusted the contrast a little, but maybe you don't think that's an improvement -- sannse (talk) 08:36, 18 February 2007 (UTC)
Thanks![edit source]
Hey, I just wanted to thank you personally for the comments you left for Obsessive-compulsive rhyming disorder. I'm thrilled that you enjoyed the article so much. It was an amazing experience to see the vote numbers climb and to finally see the article featured, and it's even more amazing to me that there are still people out there like you who continue to compliment the work even after the voting is done. While writing the articles is quite fun in of itself, the real satisfaction is gained from knowing that people are reading and enjoying them. This whole day has just been incredible thanks to support from people like you. Thank you so much! -- CUN PLS VFH (Miniluv•Minitrue•Unsoc) 02:02, 21 June 2007 (UTC)
Thank You[edit | edit source]
So you can sell it for a lot of money on eBay.
Your vote for HowTo:Deceive people on eBay is greatly appreciated.
Right-o, Thanking Commences[edit source]
Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 20:00, 12 July 2007 (UTC)
Quack.[edit source]
Thanks for your vote in Writer of the Month. It really means a lot to me.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 19:12, 1 August 2007 (UTC)
Appreciation noted[edit source]
You're most welcome for the little I did to "enhance" your article. I sort of consider it my job, in lieu of doing anything useful with my life. As for putting it up as a lead story, I call them as I see them. Thanks for contributing, and many happy returns, I hope. Cheers! Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 16:54, 27 August 2007 (UTC)
Dead good[edit source]
You might like to know that Cajek nominated Necrophiliphobia for feature. Good luck! -- 15Mickey20 (talk to Mickey) 11:41, 11 July 2008 (UTC)
Join the UnOrder Today![edit source]
PS there is an usually large amount of blood.
Hello?[edit source]
—Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) 13:45, 15 March 2009 (UTC)
Umm... Hi![edit source]
Here I am, talking to you. Are you feeling less lonely now? SIRE FREDDMOOSHA AMUSE ME 05:20, 22 March 2009 (UTC)
How about we feature your talk page?[edit source]
"how about we feature the talk page? Because I'm pretty sure it's about as funny if not more so than the main page?" Got a kick out of what you posted on Talk:Natural Selection King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court) 04:31, April 19, 2010 (UTC)
Pee review[edit source]
Hi Mrthejazz, first of all thank you, we always appreciate people helping out on PEE review and giving their time to help out other writers. However on checking your recent reviews I have noticed that they fell below the standard that we expect, if you aren't sure what your reviews should look like then take a quick look at the guidelines. You may also find it helpful to take a look at this review to see the kind of thing we are looking for. Thanks again for helping out, hopefully I will see you around PEE review a bit more in future. --ChiefjusticeGameBoy 22:44, April 22, 2010 (UTC)
Have you heard about the new epic Skype group...[edit source]
Because it's pretty fuckin' epic, and it's where all the cool Uncyclopedians meet! We'd totally love it if you'd come hang out with us! Anyways, here's a link to the UnSkype forums. If you download Skype and hit the "join" thing at the top, you'll be added to the group! http://unskype.crazyburd.net
Also, I saw your Yellow Wong article, and really love it. It's pretty much the coolest thing ever. I really appreciate your craziness.
Love,
- If log-in on Skype while using someone else's computer, you use your own account, so when they log-in using theirs, they're not part of the Skype group. But if you're not up for Skype right now, you should totally hang out with us on the IRC. Love,
Woo! Feature![edit source]
And I felt it prudent to tell you that, this being your third feature, you now are entitled to an entry on the Hall Of Shame. Go ahead and add yourself to the list, as that's the customary way around here. And many congratulations. -RAHB 10:11, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
Applause[edit source]
Very nice post on the censorship forum. You cut through all the arguments and emotion and came to the base of it, the reason that Uncy is a nice free playground for adults. Congrats! Al sans chains 12:01 19 5 MMX
About your message[edit source]
I'd love for you to do some formatting and any necessary edits on my article. Just tell me on my talk page when you've done them and I'll credit you on my userpage --SadisticWolf 14:22, May 21, 2010 (UTC)
Yo! I moved it.[edit source]
Here. Just to make sure no one else will do it. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 03:04, May 23, 2010 (UTC)
Did you know...[edit source]
That the images for an entry in that category are supposed to be made by you, i.e. you take a picture of it in real life or you photoshop some images you found somewhere.
03:48, 24 May 2010Thank you[edit source]
Thank you for how you handled things here. This could very easily have blown up all over the place, and you managed to express how you felt and work to prevent an explosion. More people should try to follow your example--including trouble-making me. Thanks. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court) 17:30, May 25, 2010 (UTC)
Re: Hey, is this an okay place to give a few T-shirt ideas?[edit source]
Yes. However, the requirements for images is as follows:
- 2000 x 2000 px
- 200 dpi or better
The images you've posted do not qualify, though I feel they'd be great design ideas. We can't blow up images without degrading their print quality. If you can find larger versions of these images, they may quality. But most of the featured images on Uncyclopedia, while looking great on a computer screen, would not look good on a t-shirt. --EMC [TALK] 05:57 Jun 7 2010
Thanks for the VFH nom.[edit source]
I hope we win. :3 --SadisticWolf 18:34, June 7, 2010 (UTC)
PLS[edit source]
Now that the voting is in, I must tell you that the inspiration for my entry, User:Zim ulator/HowTo:Be Reverend Zim ulator. Your title, User:Mrthejazz/Howto: Staple toast to a wall, had me chuckling for days. After reading your work, I thought it would be great fun to do something similarly styled and enter it into PLS, just to be a dick. I didn't think it would even be accepted, never mind voted on. Congratulations on yours, it did deservedly well. Cheers! Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 21:53, June 7, 2010 (UTC)
PLS money[edit source]
Hey, drop me a line at electrified_mocha_chinchilla@yahoo.com to let me know how you'd like to receive your prize money. --EMC [TALK] 17:21 Jun 8 2010
- Congrats! Victory is sweet! (And tell him you want your money in gold. GOLD! That you want your money in gold!!!) Aleister 3:45 9 6 MMX
I'm A Kite![edit source]
There's absolutely nothing wrong with tweaking your work on the fly whilst on VFH. There might be a few purists who would disagree but I'd add/edit away fearlessly. If you were conducting massive alterations to the article, that might be another story but if you're just rewording/adding more jokes......nobody cares-- 13:40, June 14, 2010 (UTC)
Unreliable Narrator[edit source]
Just finished reviewing this article and I have to say it is definately, maybe, probably, the best article I have ever had the pleasure of reviewing. Very well done. --—John Lydon 14:29, June 15, 2010 (UTC)
Kite[edit source]
While it's going to be featured in two days, I'm having a technical issue to place the feature tag, some problem with the spam filter. I hope to sort it out in a few hours. ~ 16:57, June 16, 2010 (UTC)
- Appreciate the heads up User:Mrthejazz/sig 18:11, June 16, 2010 (UTC)
Fundleberry[edit source]
Or however his name is spelled. That was so cool, a very nice honor. Lots of us love his work, but you are the first person since October of 2008 to leave a note on his page saying so. You must have a heart of gold, and hey, I've been missing one of those, and will call the police if it's not immediately returned. Aleister 5:00 19 6 MMX
- p.s. Congrats on all the nice features.
- I remember his style of informed randomness and mashups, and it really inspired me, although it took me this long to actually be able to write something decent. I hope he comes back and blesses us all with his amazing talent. It would probably liven this place up a bit. Thank you, by the way.User:Mrthejazz/sig 05:05, June 19, 2010 (UTC)
I just saw your Wonderpets article.[edit source]
Please marry me. Love,
Hey faggot[edit source]
I moved your article or something. Cause I make things better. I'm actually better than you. It's a fact. Now kiss the tip of my penis. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 12:54, June 30, 2010 (UTC)
Thanks!!! <3[edit source]
Love,
A positive message for you...[edit source]
NO!
Nominally Humane! some time Friday, 05:48, Jul 2 2010 UTC
Thou art funny![edit source]
For "iPad", you get my personal award. Good work man!
Yet Another Worthless Award[edit source]
As YOU voted for BIBLE! to be featured on the front page,
this FRAMED, VERY RARE and HIGH COLLECTIBLE
JESUS AND LINDSAY LOHAN
issue of the magazine is YOURS TO KEEP!
Generations to come will thank you for this wonderful keepsake.
Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 11:28, July 9, 2010 (UTC)
Mrthejizz[edit source]
I bet you wish you were half as witty as I fucking am -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. (Harass) 08:59, August 1, 2010 (UTC)
Also, your cheque for PLS is delayed because e|m|c mailed it to himself, the dumbass (and I'm serious) -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. (Harass) 09:00, August 1, 2010 (UTC)
That wasn't a joke? ShiiiiiiiiitUser:Mrthejazz/sig 14:00, August 1, 2010 (UTC)
- he wrote the recipient address in the corner, his address in the center. Fuckin' envelopes, how do they work? -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. (Harass) 14:03, August 1, 2010 (UTC)
I'm the luckiest guy on Uncy. . .[edit source]
. . . because I nommed and voted on WotM before your name was added. Both of you deserve this award, and you've had quite a run lately (which is continuing, always nice). If I hadn't voted already it would be a hard choice choosing between you guys. Yay. Good luck! Aleister 19:56 2 8
- P.s.and there's a "contest" tonight if you're interested. I'll put it on here in a minute.
Contest today, August 2nd (U.S. time) or 3rd (civilized world time)[edit source]
Happymonkey called for a writing contest which will start at 2:00 UTC (10 p.m. eastern time in the United States and other weird countries). Contestents will give each other an exact name of an article at app. 9:59 eastern time, and then we will write until 11:15 (3:15 UTC). We need at least one judge who will look at all the articles, say nay, or yay, or something, and tell us whatever they want to. Please sign up on Happymonkeys talk page, as participant or judge(s), and then we can pair people up around 9:30 eastern and let them know who they will give their page title to. (Inspired by DrSkullthumper's contest of a month or so ago). Aleister 16:05 2 8
- We have you listed on the forum page and the talk page. Happymonkey changed the overall time, so now it will be a 24 hour contest. We will exchange article names in a few minutes, stay tuned. Al 1:44 3 8
im referring to the colour. dont know if it will be easy or hard. good luck[edit source]
Beige
Shabidoo 02:05, August 3, 2010 (UTC)
UnBooks:Little Yellow Wong[edit source]
I saw you have put this up as a feature. This is a real dilemma for me regarding voting! I like the execution and ideas behind it, imagining if the writer of Little Black Sambo had time to write an entire canon of Reinforcing Stereotypes for Children book series but perhaps if the language of the Little Yellow Wong was more in line from that era rather than being oddly modern, it might make it easier for me to consider my voting intentions. I know it might be a minor point but I think it would be a clear signal that the article is meant as a parody of a writer from that era rather than anything that could be construed to be racist today.
Many years ago I was given a pile of children's books that my uncle had grown up with in the 1940s and 1950s. When I read them at the time, I didn't think they were that bad (just old fashioned). But now when I look at them again , they are full of cartoons of Africans as cannibals or 'slant eyed Asians' kidnapping beautiful white women, all standard humour from that era. Fascinating as historical documents today but the challenge of writing in those styles is something I would hesitate before trying to parody. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 07:04, August 5, 2010 (UTC)
Thanks![edit source]
Bettie Page would like to thank you for helping Bettie Page become a featured article | ||
Mere words do not suffice to thank you for this great act, so feel free to undress and admire the almighty goddess of pin-up. |
I am eternally grateful!
11:31, 10 August 2010Beige[edit source]
Look at Red link and figure it out. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 11:55, August 29, 2010 (UTC)
Kill Yourself[edit source]
By the time you posted that to ban patrol I had already banned him and got part of the way through rolling back his edits. Therefore, You suck and I hate you.
Just kidding, I love you really. -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. (Harass) 02:37, August 31, 2010 (UTC)
Jeez, I was only trying to be helpful[edit source]
Or did you not notice that TKF moved your user page and talk page to Mrthejizz? -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. (Harass) 04:16, August 31, 2010 (UTC)
Do you happen to have a list of articles you've created anywhere?[edit source]
If so, I'd like to use it to back up some complaining.
Thanks. ~ (talk) (stalk) -- 20100903 - 17:08 (UTC)
- His "work" is here. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 17:40, September 3, 2010 (UTC)
Care for a spot of tea?[edit source]
I need to have a private talk with you[edit source]
I'll probably be on Skype tomorrow night, so you better be on. This is Uncyclopedia-related business, namely about how to deal with "them" by writing the greatest satirical work this site has ever seen (other than what TOAST and BAGEL did, as they can't be topped). Understand? It's gonna require complete unbridled genius, though. How much do you know about history? MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 01:56, September 20, 2010 (UTC)
- If by "them" you mean the British, then that happened in 1776. I'm totally over it. User:Mrthejazz/sig 02:19, September 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Well I'm not. Because I'm an AMERICAN! But yeah, its kinda an anti-Imperialism thing I'm aiming for. Those damned Brits won't know what hit them. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 02:23, September 20, 2010 (UTC)
Well done you[edit source]
Writer of the Month September 2010 | |
--ChiefjusticeGameBoy 06:44, October 1, 2010 (UTC)
- Finally, the appreciation you deserve. --Black Flamingo 07:12, October 1, 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks everybody! User:Mrthejazz/sig 03:40, October 3, 2010 (UTC)
You... well... eh.[edit source]
At this point, you may also want to consider checking your pockets so as to ascertain that everything is still there. |
I love it. ~ *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101009 - 16:50 (UTC)
UnNews[edit source]
Yo bro! Don't ask me why, but the UnNews format of choice, as I was told, is to make the headers without caps on each word. For example, your UnNews:Michael Bolton Sings "Broken Hallelujah" with a Group of Choir Boys. Suicide Rates Skyrocket. Is supposed to be like THIS: UnNews:Michael Bolton sings "Broken Hallelujah" with a group of choir boys. Suicide rates skyrocket. If you're not sure just ask Spike, or God, whoever came first. Hey, good story. Cheers!--Funnybony 13:59, Oct 11
Just droppin' by[edit source]
Whatcha doin'? Have you gotten into the WotM Clubhouse, how about that Sauna (and the Asian ho's we keep it stocked with)! Any new pages in the assembly line? Where's the kitchen here, ah, there it is. Thanks for the tea. Aleister 00:40 15 10
- Glad I got to you in time, before the job interview. The best way to blow the interview is to ask the interviewee how much money they make and if they spend it on whores. Steal something off their desk when they're watching, and pretend you didn't do it, act offended when they accuse you. Put your feet up on their desk, lean back in the chair, and ask if the picture on his desk is his wife or his daughter, and are they available? That should do it. Aleister 11:08 15 10
Thanks[edit source]
This is Anthony Kiedis of the Red Hot Chili Peppers, delivering a message from LongLiverh3.
He says, in between fantasizing about his teacher and gobbling nutmeg in a pathetic attempt to get high, that he thanks you for your vote. The asshole is too lazy to tell you himself, so he sent me. |
~~Sir Fightstar Rocks! CUN 02:16, October 17, 2010 (UTC)
Audio[edit source]
Snagged and listened to it at about midnight. It was great. One thing, though- you repeated the wrong verse at the end. No worries, though, it was still very well done. That "cubicle blues and the breakroom breakdown" line sounded right out of Beck's notebook, don't you think? --~~First Child Rei Ayanami (give orders) 02:49, October 19, 2010 (UTC)
Thanks[edit source]
I just popped in and saw you voted for Cemetery of the Absurd. Thanks! That was so much fun to write I almost died laughing, and wish I had! It would be fun if it were featured on Halloween, my fave holiday. An idea, we all should give out candy here, like have tons of candy (see pic here) and people can come by user pages and take a piece. Ummmmmm, candy. Lyrithya has already Halloweened her talk page. Thanks again. Aleister 12:01 23 10
And thanks for voting for Pursuit of Happiness... I finally got around to thankses! Or something. What's going on? ~ Lyrithya *shifty eyes* (words) (actions) -- 20101027 - 17:04 (UTC)
UnNews:Area gay man has Gay-Area man-sex[edit source]
I removed the excess capitals from your headline and added hyphens. Also listed it on QVFD, as it does not look like news to me, and asked for independent opinions; ChiefjusticeDS and Aleister in Chains supported it (see my talk page). Spıke ¬ 12:51 12-Nov-10
Helloooooo[edit source]
And salutations. Noticed your entry in the turkey contest has no link, it is just a red thing. That is funny though, and will win first prize for sure. Yay! Aleister I'm not telling you what time it is. Ha ha ha ha hee hee hee hee, leaving you in the dark about the time, he ha ha ha yah yah yah hee hee hee
- Ah, tricky, sneaking an entry in there under the cover of red link. I glanced at it, but will read it after the entries are closed. And since this is a wiki, when you finish your page you can just go and close the entries. Hah hah ah ah ah hah hah hah hah hah h a h Loleister 12:50 23 11 year of our fnord MMX
And after seeing Black Flamingo's vote it looks like I've single-handidly sunk your entries chances of winning top prize. Why why why in God's name didn't you write up a few paragraphs of intro to the vid??? Two of the main rules say the entry should be text based and shouldn't contain an audio, and so according to the rules you entered a blank white space, which if I wasn't a judge I would have voted for out of surrealism but since I stupidly signed up as a judge I have to be some kind of responsible. Then I see Black Flamingo's vote, say to myself WTF, and then say to myself "WTF, I will now have to go explain to Mrthejazz, and here we are. I'm a vegetarian (a vegan most of the time, except when I'm hooked on sugar which is about 1/3 or the time, then I eat some cookies and crap) so am sympathetic to pointing out the pure sickness of the real world, which you do, yet it is still just a white space in the Uncy world /slits wrist out of guilt, will try to type name before . ............ [[user:Aleiswv; ';'
- You...you mean I won't get a little electronic badge saying how awesome I am? OH, THE HUMANITY!!!1 Psh, I'll get over it. Even if I can't read, I don't regret a thing. User:Mrthejazz/sig 12:44, December 9, 2010 (UTC)
- I just came back from the blood loss to read the other scores in the contest, and you are kicking ass in the second category, so you don't need this one. Leave our category alone with your bloodthirsty chick joke, go on, win or place in the second category, what do you want, everything? Leave some contest drippings and trophies for someone else. /walks away mumbling "Greedy bastard" Aleister 12:45 9 12
- You...you mean I won't get a little electronic badge saying how awesome I am? OH, THE HUMANITY!!!1 Psh, I'll get over it. Even if I can't read, I don't regret a thing. User:Mrthejazz/sig 12:44, December 9, 2010 (UTC)
Hey lonely[edit source]
Hi Jazz, not sure if you're still here these days, but would you like to contribue to this at all? We need more and you're, like, really funny and shit. --Black Flamingo 22:44, January 14, 2011 (UTC)
- Great additions there. I particularly liked the otter one. Had no idea why the text was so small but I'll definitely use it, as well as most of the others. Thanks. --Black Flamingo 10:16, January 15, 2011 (UTC)
Thanks, bro[edit source]
Eye C Wut U Deed Thar! Lulz. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 05:00, January 19, 2011 (UTC)
- Any time bra. User:Mrthejazz/sig 05:08, January 19, 2011 (UTC)
You're never on Skype any more[edit source]
...which is a shame because I recently bought myself a coffee machine and I wanted to tell you how much I now respect you as a Barista - or in other words, I wanted to harangue you for tips on making perfectly frothed milk and the method of pouring it into the cup. -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. (Harass) 05:55, January 19, 2011 (UTC)
- Actually I'm not a barista anymore. BUT, I can give you tips, assuming your steamer is anything like the one I used at work. Plus, nobody is on skype anymore. Everytime I go there, it's like a ghost town. It's depressing. User:Mrthejazz/sig 05:59, January 19, 2011 (UTC)
- Well SOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRY! 06:07, January 19, 2011 (UTC)MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here
How is this funny?[edit source]
It just looks like an ugly crossdresser to me. And it seems to detract from the article.
12:16, 31 January 2011- Now, you may be familiar with my penchant for hating flash for simply existing, but I actually looked at this one and I'm inclined to agree with Socky - its humour aspect appears to be basing off the fact that it is weird, something that is completely unlike the rest of the article, the humour of which seems to derive primarily from mocking the menfolks' reactions to the hotness of the ladies. As as this resembles more of a turn-off, thus interfering with the main joke of the piece, I have removed it... please don't hurt me, crazy man. ~ 00:59, 1 February 2011
- First off all, the crossdresser is not ugly. Second, of all the people I thought you would support it Lyrithya. Third, there is nothing funnier than killing a boner. It's not a distraction, it's just taking the joke further. Mock their reactions, and then when they think they're going to get this sexy reaction... WHAM! boner kill. In either case, I rescind my vote for this to be on front page. User:Mrthejazz/sig 15:13, February 1, 2011 (UTC)
- P.S. You're all just mad that I cock blocked you. User:Mrthejazz/sig 15:19, February 1, 2011 (UTC)
- I don't wank to innocent images like that, though. And I'm pretty sure Lyrithya doesn't have a cock. ;)
- It's on a completely different note than the rest of it. Twists are one thing, but this is just random. And indeed, I ain't a wanker. ~ 17:07, 1 February 2011
- sploogy eyes* User:Mrthejazz/sig 05:46, February 2, 2011 (UTC)
15:47, 1 February 2011
- It's on a completely different note than the rest of it. Twists are one thing, but this is just random. And indeed, I ain't a wanker. ~ 17:07, 1 February 2011
- I don't wank to innocent images like that, though. And I'm pretty sure Lyrithya doesn't have a cock. ;)
- P.S. You're all just mad that I cock blocked you. User:Mrthejazz/sig 15:19, February 1, 2011 (UTC)
- First off all, the crossdresser is not ugly. Second, of all the people I thought you would support it Lyrithya. Third, there is nothing funnier than killing a boner. It's not a distraction, it's just taking the joke further. Mock their reactions, and then when they think they're going to get this sexy reaction... WHAM! boner kill. In either case, I rescind my vote for this to be on front page. User:Mrthejazz/sig 15:13, February 1, 2011 (UTC)
Regicide[edit source]
This article is great. Its my favourite of the rewrites, especially the part about people murdering Reggies to try to become King, I laughed out loud, in a cafe with wifi and people looked at me strange! The Dawkins article too, my favorite alt. article in the comp. It inspired me a lot while writing one of my articles. --Shabidoo 19:39, February 1, 2011 (UTC) & --Shabidoo 21:01, February 1, 2011 (UTC)
A word of apology[edit source]
--CheesyBoy 09:44, February 7, 2011 (UTC)
'Cheesy Boy would like to thank you for asking about cheese.As compensation, he sent you a photo report of a wierdo stripping.'
This is to reward you-a lostnot really footage of a wierdo stripping.Apologies given for not responding earlier.
Do I like cheese?Of course.Do I like balls?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Thank you for reading this message, with thanks. By the way, you DID ask me about cheese. I love pizza(with lots of cheese). Since I have answered your question, bye.
Cheese?An Awnser[edit source]
--CheesyBoy 05:43, February 11, 2011 (UTC)
Thats me, yup, the cheese .How cheesy.You asked if I was completely cheese...actually, not really.Ok, maybe, but you can tell from the photo.Sigggghhhhhh...it hurts, because I have so many holes.Worse still, I was given the cheese-of-the-day award. STOP HOLDING IT ABOVE MY HEAD!
GREAT!
Now that I mentioned I'm completely cheesy, can I go now?GREATY!!!Wait...WHA-
'Cheesy Boy has just been stabbed and is unvaliable to assisst your service.'
R.I.P.:A cheesy death for a cheesy guy[edit source]
--CheesyBoy 06:39, February 12, 2011 (UTC)
'A cheese who left for good,a cheese who left for crude,...'
'Dearly missed by his cheesy mozorellas, but will be ressurected soon.'
'In memeory of cheese, I present cheese the-' NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Ah...[edit source]
But you're a wonderful arguer. At any rate, what you guys did to the thing is a lot better, small as it was... at least there's something there now, and it now also sort of makes sense why it's even here. That was a large part of what was bugging me before, though I had a hard time placing it. ~ 17:01, 17 February 2011
FUCK YOU![edit source]
Just kidding homie. If I see those shifty eyes one more time... User:Mrthejazz/sig 03:13, February 18, 2011 (UTC)
- *shifty eyes* ~ 03:40, 18 February 2011
- I see you've been cheesed, or blessed with cheese, or melty ready to go. Your audio on the Madison Movement page was genius, you and Dexter tore the page a new one. thanks for playing. Aleister 3:40 27-2-'11
Ditto (see Section 71.1 supra, or Section 73 sub)[edit source]
Earlier today, I replied to your turd droppings on my User Talk page, and you still haven't bothered to get back to me. What, too busy pretending you've got a fleeping life (which actually involves actual, non-metaphorical, actually-actual fleeping (*)) or something? C'mon, you troll-'mo -- you've admitted too much on your vanity page for even a retard like me to buy that garbage.
(*) Repetition. Yes, I know. It was in my mother's milk. (Though most of said milk wasn't exactly LOLOMGROTFLIYKWIMAITYD material, esp. since none of the afore-mentioned acronyms had been invented yet -- but you fleeping get where I'm fleeping coming from, Bro. May I call you "Bro"? Or, since you're threatening to forcibly adopt me, maybe "Daddy" would be more appropriate?)
Stumbo 06:51, February 28, 2011 (UTC)
- Fuck yes. This is going to be fun. By the way, I was busy writing you an email. If you want to get in contact, nighttime is best. I do actually have somewhat of a life, believe it or not, I just choose to spend the free time I do have very very poorly. User:Mrthejazz/sig 07:12, February 28, 2011 (UTC)
73 73 73 73 73 73 72 "NO NO NO, it's 73, you moron!" "OK, whatever, please don't hurt me." 73 73 73 73 73 73 73[edit source]
Yeah, what that really smart and really funny "Stumbo" guy said. You should listen to him more, if you know what's good for you. But I bet that's not his real name -- then again, who fleeping gives a fleep?
-- somebody who isn't Stumbo 06:38, February 28, 2011 (UTC)
Speaking of the non-negative integer known as "73" ["mod" "10"][edit source]
I once composed the most-ambitious-ever cryptic clue, AFAIK (an &lit. and a half, as in, every word in the clue played three different roles), the answer to which was "seventy-three." If you're into cryptic crosswords, I'll email it to you; otherwise, I don't wanna out myself too soon, since I was careless and/or vain enough to use my real name (see Section 70-whatever supra), back then. These days, I'm even vainer, but not as careless.
Stumbo 07:15, February 28, 2011 (UTC)
- Cool story bro! User:Mrthejazz/sig 07:37, February 28, 2011 (UTC)
ghjdfhg174207.+00001 (very old Intel joke)[edit source]
I've added some yet-more-putrid MindThoughts on my Talk page. (BTW, I fleeping love you, man, regardless of how badly your golf game sucks.)
Random '90's quote I'm totally not responsible for:
-- "I said, 'you fleeping die!,' to her." Etc. The first Uncyclopedian to correctly identify the quote will get a cookie valued at $.50 USD or so. And can then fleeping die, not that I care or anything.
Stumbo 10:25, February 28, 2011 (UTC)
an even-better trivia q[edit source]
I posted this in my college dorm's TV lounge, circa 1988:
"This room will be a bakery. Thought you'd like to know." -- Identify the quote, from a very-popular rock album.
I offered a buck ($1.00 CDN) for a correct answer. Needless to say, nobody got it.
If you get it without web-searching, I'll be so highly impressed I'll name my in-laws' first-born after you.
Stumbo 11:22, February 28, 2011 (UTC)
super happy competition topic[edit source]
Hey your topic will be ready here at about five minutes before the start of the competition (5pm EST or 2200 UTC). HAVE FUN AND GOOD LUCK :) holding in my bladder --ShabiDOO 21:47, March 2, 2011 (UTC)
Chopping[edit source]
Mr the Jazz,
You are the only person who hasnt made it clear if you chopped any photos in your article. I wanted to add a point or two if you chopped one or more of the pics. Let me know as the points are almost settled. Thanks for the article too and for participating in the end, great article. --ShabiDOO 17:09, March 11, 2011 (UTC)
IJ[edit source]
BTW, I've re-edited the Infinite Jest article (q.v.), by removing all the old crap and replacing it with some slightly-better new crap of my very own.
Comments?
Stumbo 09:05, March 12, 2011 (UTC)
Ob .Sig: "I'm not a civil libertarian; I'm a rude one."
Happy Monkey Results[edit source]
CONGRATULATIONS !!! You placed second in the Happy Monkey Competition. According to five different judges you wrote an extra awsome article. Thanks for participating. PS if you want your pee review to be expanded into a formal 50point review, please let me know on my talk page and Ill get to work on it right away! OLÉ!!! --ShabiDOO 19:32, March 14, 2011 (UTC)
This is my recent change![edit source]
Recent changes, awesome. User:Mrthejazz/sig 04:47, March 16, 2011 (UTC)
- yeah, changes! --
- You can never have enough change! User:Mrthejazz/sig 04:53, March 16, 2011 (UTC)
04:49, March 16, 2011 (UTC)
Cheesy Boy, graveyard[edit source]
What I mean has absolutely nothing to do with the title above.After all, I'm already dead, then alive.Ah, its not my fault though.Long time no see?Yeah, nice of you to drop by my account to leave a long time no see greeting , but I'm sort of encountering a problem.WHY DID'NT YOU RESPOND EARLIER???I was pretty lonely, sucking it up with my other cheesy pals.Well, anyway, I'm soughting it out with this guy, and then I blew his brains out.Then I turned into a monopoly box.What?Hey, stop looking at me like that, I'm serious, so I sotta need people like you to help me turn back into my normal cheesy shape!Hey.Remember, I gotta need someone's help as I turned into a monopoly box.DAMN IT, I REALLY DID TURN INTO ONE!!!Well, what do you expect, its uncyclopedia, after all...
--CheesyBoy 07:22, March 20, 2011 (UTC)
Wanna visit a country?[edit source]
OK, pick where you want to go for a holiday: Philippines, Cambodia, Malaysia, Japan, Australia, North Korea, India, Pakistan, Uzbekistan. 11:54, March 25, 2011 (UTC)
iFixyoursig[edit source]
I'll fix it if I get a kitten in return. -- Lollipop - 01:52, 29 April 2011
- What needs fixing? Ah I see now.User:Mrthejazz/sig 01:56, April 29, 2011 (UTC)
- I'll Lollify it if you want to. Can I Lollify it? -- Lollipop - 01:58, 29 April 2011
- What is this, lollipedia? Do I look like Mrthelolli? Do I look like somebody who likes adverbs? Do I look like I disrespect my dentist? Do I? DO I?! Meh, sure why not. User:Mrthejazz/sig 02:01, April 29, 2011 (UTC)
- It's going to look awesome. -- Lollipop - 02:02, 29 April 2011
- that was quickUser:Mrthejazz/sig 02:43, April 29, 2011 (UTC)
- Óle! Thats a nieeeeeeeeeeece sig! Lolipop does it again! --ShabiDOO 02:49, April 29, 2011 (UTC)
- Now if I can just outsource my article writing I'll be in some serious biz. User:Mrthejazz/sig 02:58, April 29, 2011 (UTC)
- Óle! Thats a nieeeeeeeeeeece sig! Lolipop does it again! --ShabiDOO 02:49, April 29, 2011 (UTC)
- that was quickUser:Mrthejazz/sig 02:43, April 29, 2011 (UTC)
- It's going to look awesome. -- Lollipop - 02:02, 29 April 2011
- What is this, lollipedia? Do I look like Mrthelolli? Do I look like somebody who likes adverbs? Do I look like I disrespect my dentist? Do I? DO I?! Meh, sure why not. User:Mrthejazz/sig 02:01, April 29, 2011 (UTC)
- I'll Lollify it if you want to. Can I Lollify it? -- Lollipop - 01:58, 29 April 2011
Stop being disappeared[edit source]
Stop it! --
01:42, May 22, 2011 (UTC)- Yeah dis-disappear yourself now. Climbing un:hos isn't as fun when it doesn't involve desperately trying to overtake you. --Black Flamingo 10:45, May 22, 2011 (UTC)
- Sorry. Cant. Stop. Masturbating. User:Mrthejazz/sig 13:36, May 22, 2011 (UTC)
User:Mrthejazz/UnNews:Psycho rambo cop guns down teens in post traumatic killing spree[edit source]
I userspaced your UnNews article. Sorry man, but anyone can write the same sentence over and over, and it doesn't produce much of any reaction for a reader, who comes to the story looking for some spoof news. ~ 00:44, 27 May 2011 (UTC)
- It is spoof news. The article referenced in question is the first reference on there. Additionally, it is a spoof on the use of hyperbole in the newsroom as well as a satire of how the news is always attracted to the dark and terrifying stories of our everyday lives. But hey, to each their own. User:Mrthejazz/sig 03:26, May 27, 2011 (UTC)
Sincere thanks for supporting one or more of these articles on VFH:[edit source]
- Guru Maharaj Ji
- Don Martin
- Blue-ringed octopus
- Lunar Launch (with Socky)
- 2012 (with MrN)
like, really!--Funnybony 21:02, May 29
Actually...[edit source]
My reposte to that article and few other things was begun a few days after your stunning piece of work... your thanks is misplaced since you had only your own "Inspiration" to thank. Happy times.--Sycamore (Talk) 20:50, June 8, 2011 (UTC)
- That's strange. I strictly remember seeing the link, remembering it and thinking of yeah, that famine article, and then writing. Hmm. I'll have to do some digging I guess. User:Mrthejazz/sig 03:14, June 9, 2011 (UTC)
Spam[edit source]
Jazzyboy, want to help rewrite this? Á la lonely hearts column? I've got a couple of people interested; I've been networking all morning, opening doors, shaking hands, throwing balls back and forth. I think we've got something. Ideas on the talkpage. --Black Flamingo 20:00, June 14, 2011 (UTC)
- My first reaction was, "Invite a bunch of people to edit it to make it feel like it was their article so that those people can then vote FOR on VFH and pass it through? That trick will never work a second time!" But this is uncyclopedia after all, so why not? User:Mrthejazz/sig 22:18, June 15, 2011 (UTC)
- It's all numbers baby. Plus my wife goes insane with desire for me every time I get another feature. --Black Flamingo 13:25, June 18, 2011 (UTC)
- No way, you mean there's at least two people on this site who have a spouse? User:Mrthejazz/sig 21:45, June 19, 2011 (UTC)
- It's all numbers baby. Plus my wife goes insane with desire for me every time I get another feature. --Black Flamingo 13:25, June 18, 2011 (UTC)
Be Rest Assured[edit source]
I know.Be rest assured I will keep my line cheesy.As cheesy as ever.And your cat?Your cat is doing fine![1] See, I've even taken a photo of your cat.
- ↑ I know you don't have a cat.The mammal in the photo is a dog.
--CheesyBoy 14:41, June 16, 2011 (UTC)
logo/nologo[edit source]
{{logo|logo=Anti-uncyc.png|top=0|Alt=Ironic usage I L3 UN|size=150px}} this makes my altlogo feature correctly. --Kэвилипс MUN,CM,NS,3of7 17:30, June 16, 2011 (UTC)
- Unless the viewer is using firefox 4, that is... ~ 11:17, 17 June 2011
Complementary thank you note, submitted[edit source]
Doomy doomy doomy[edit source]
For furthering the
of Earth! Tacos for all!
Tacoooooos!!
Thanks! 06:41, 30 June 2011
How's Life?[edit source]
Greetings <insert name here>. Why are you reading this? Unless you're Mrthejazz, there is no need for you to read this. Seriously? You're still reading? You're such a Noobz --ǝʇɐ noʎ ǝsǝǝɥɔ ʎʞɐǝɹɟ ǝɥʇ 05:34, September 8, 2011 (UTC)
- I'm coo. User:Mrthejazz/sig 05:04, September 14, 2011 (UTC)
Greetings[edit source]
I have gone through my records and it appears as though you may have voted for me for some award, supported one or more of my articles on VFH, or supported one or more of my images on VFP, in the past year or so. If this is not the case, then please ignore this message. Otherwise, thank you for your support. May you have a long and fruitful life, and have many parasites. ~ 18:57, 6 January 2012
What better way to revitalize your presence on uncyclopedia[edit source]
than this? --ShabiDOO 11:32, January 24, 2012 (UTC) ~
NOVELY FOAM HANDS[edit source]
Yeah............yeah yeah yea! Your article is featured today. ROCKANDROLL!!! --ShabiDOO 12:13, March 13, 2012 (UTC)
- I'm a happy camper. It's kind of funny. I go long periods of time without checking uncyc, but whenever I do, it seems like one of my articles is up for feature. One of those strange coincidences I suppose. User:Mrthejazz/sig 02:43, March 14, 2012 (UTC)
Forum:(Insert drama-inducing forum topic here)[edit source]
That reminded me of something. Nominally Humane! 08:43, May 16, 2012 (UTC)
Cheers[edit source]
I'm done here.
A few days ago, I submitted a damn good article, only to be insulted by some idiot(s).
Why is it that people totally unfamiliar with subject X feel free to comment -- and then, rule -- on an article about X?
My final judgement on this site:
- Original idea: brilliant
- Implementation: so-so
- Administration: crap
Thank you (MrTJ) for your friendly help. Oh well.
Stumbo (talk) 08:24, May 23, 2012 (UTC)
- Hey Stumbo, sorry to hear it. I'm mostly retired here myself. I would be lying (and putting it on pretty thick for that matter) if I said this place is perfect. This place has more drama than a teen soap opera. I looked in your contributions to see if I could find the article in question and found this. If that's the article and an admin userspaced it, I'm sorry to hear it.
- Myself, I am pretty much oblivious to the subject matter (Oh Jesus, I know that guy!) so I can't judge one way or the other on content, though you sound like you're past that point anyway. Taking a cursory look at the article on your userspace, (if indeed that was even the article in question) I would say the article is a little short and I don't personally get most of the references. The images and captions are awesome though. If I were in their position, I would not have userspaced it, although I probably would have put a "stub" tag on it so it could see a little expansion.
- If you have decided to leave, I certainly don't blame you. I can't tell you the number of times I've written an article that was more experimental and crazy and it just soared over everybody's heads. The main thing I hope you take away from all this is that while some admins are quick on the kill article trigger finger it's (usually) not personal. If they userspaced it, they at least found some potential in it, and probably just want to see a few more changes before it gets mainspaced.
- In either case, best of luck to you in your endeavors. I enjoyed mentoring you, and hopefully I was more of a help than a hindrance. :) User:Mrthejazz/sig 16:20, May 27, 2012 (UTC)
Yes, that's the article.
I don't personally get most of the references
You can't, unless you've read the original M&M (and remember enough about it). It's not all that obscure -- it's widely considered to be the best 20-century Russian novel, and Wikipedia lists 6 English translations -- but who cares, anyway? There are plenty of books I should've read, but haven't; I just wouldn't even bother reading Uncyc articles about them, much less comment or rule on such articles.
[ The main joke is the shift in the setting: M&M is set in the 20th century, not the 19th; the word "Master," in Russian, has a very different meaning (sorta like "master craftsman"); and slavery / serfdom doesn't come up at all. However, in English, the juxtaposition of someone being referred to as "the Master" with said "Master" later yelling to someone, "You are free!" suggests a slave / serf being emancipated (so the action must also move to the 19th). All the other jokes, including the pictures and "see also" links, are references to specific things in the book (with the exception of really-obvious stuff like Pilate washing his hands). ]
... I do recommend the novel (but not any specific translation -- because I've only read one or two, at most, out of curiosity, and cannot give a comparison between six). Then, go back and read my crap!
Stumbo (talk) 06:43, June 1, 2012 (UTC)
I refuse to believe you're "mostly retired". Fucker.[edit source]
“ | You know, I have to say, these insults aren't making a whole lot of sense, either. How does somebody stick something up their "ballsack?" I'm pretty sure that a ballsack doesn't have any holes, and even if it did, there's no way to take something like a webpage and stick it in there. You could print it off, I suppose, but it'd still be pretty impossible, is all I'm saying. Also, it would be considerably difficult for Mhaille to both eat your balls and stick them up his vagina, unless you just want him to suck on them for a while. But he probably can't literally eat them. You could do it in the reverse order though, I suppose. Also, since "manners" is an abstract idea, I'm pretty sure that it's impossible to shove them anywhere. I do agree though. All jews are black! | ” |
- — Mr. T. Jazz, somewhere, to someone, about something
I really can't even remember anymore, but the articles in your "userspace" may be the reason I joined this dump. I just saw your caption again ...the one for the photo of Oscar Wilde. You know, the one that reads "Hello, I'm Oscar Wilde. Why are you killing my soul?" ~ Oscar Wilde on why you are killing his soul? I do believe that I may have wet myself last year, when I read that. Everything listed here is pure crystallized awesomeness. I refuse to believe you are "retired". I REFUSE! Come back, SHANE! ~ Tue, May 29 '12 9:41 (UTC)
- Err, hate to break it to you, but that page was sporked off of Pee Review related page. The caption there? Not mine. I never finished writing that and left the caption there. Speaking of which, I should probably finish that sometime. But regardless, I'm flattered. User:Mrthejazz/sig 20:00, May 29, 2012 (UTC)
- I don't care if it was your caption or not, the rest of the pages around that area are chocolate-covered caramel and pecans with a chewy nougat center, for my brain. ~ Tue, May 29 '12 21:32 (UTC)
An secret Easter Egg?[edit source]
Where is it?--- 03:35, May 31, 2012 (UTC)
- The Easter Egg is that "he" is really this lady >>>. ~ Thu, May 31 '12 3:45 (UTC)
- Bizzeebeever, you sly dog you :) User:Mrthejazz/sig 04:14, May 31, 2012 (UTC)
Boners![edit source]
~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) 05:29, July 13, 2012 (UTC)
Welcome back![edit source]
If I came across as a dick-penis on the forums, sorry. Now get writing-ing. --Nikau (talk) 15:00, 30 October 2014 (UTC)=
Re-feature queue[edit source]
If you want, you can go to Uncyclopedia:Re-feature queue/Nominate and pick one featured article that you wrote to be re-featured. You can also pick three features written by someone else to re-feature. -- 20:18, 17 November 2014 (UTC) ww
- Okay! What year is it? Oh well. I'M PICKING ONE NOW. NOW DAMMIT!!!! Also, Sabu was working for the FBI. Isn't that wild???5 User:Mrthejazz/sig 05:55, 28 March 2016 (UTC)